Indlela Onokubakhusela Ngayo Abantwana Bakho

“Abazali ngabona banokukwazi ukukhusela abantwana babo ekusebenziseni nantoni na ngokugqithiseleyo. Bamele babe ngumzekelo kubantwana babo baze babanike inkcazelo abayifunayo.”—DONNA SHALALA, USOSIBA WE-U.S. DEPARTMENT OF HEALTH AND HUMAN SERVICES.

WENA, njengomzali ufanele udlale indima ephambili ekukhuseleni abantwana bakho kumkhwa wokusebenzisa kakubi iziyobisi. Ngelishwa, asingabo bonke abazali abanokukuqonda indlela okubaluleke ngayo oko. UIreneu, ityendyana laseBrazil uthi: “Utata wayesoloko exakekile. Wayencokola ixeshana nje nathi. Akazange akhe asicebise ngokuphathelele iziyobisi.”

Ngokwahlukileyo koko, phawula oko kuthethwa ngomnye umfana waseBrazil, ogama linguAlecxandros, uthi: “Xa kukho inkqubo ethetha ngeziyobisi kumabonwakude, utata wayesibiza nabaninawa bam ukuze size kuyibukela. Wayesibonisa ubugxwayiba akubo amakhoboka eziyobisi. Maxa wambi wayesebenzisa elo thuba ukuze asibuze enoba sikhe silubone na ulutsha olusebenzisa iziyobisi esikolweni. Ngaloo ndlela wayesilumkisa ngeengozi zokusebenzisa kakubi iziyobisi.”

Ngaba ukhe waxubusha nabantwana bakho ngeengozi zokusebenzisa iziyobisi? Ukuze ukwazi ukwenjenjalo, kusenokufuneka wenze uphando ngeziyobisi. Abazali abangamaKristu banokunceda abantwana babo baqonde ukuba ukusebenzisa iziyobisi ngokungekho mthethweni kuyingozi ngokomoya. IBhayibhile isibongoza ukuba sizilondoloze ukuze sihlale sicocekile ngokwenyama nangokomoya. (2 Korinte 7:1) Ukufundisisa iBhayibhile rhoqo nabantwana bethu kunokuba sisixhobo esinamandla sokubakhusela.a

‘Umhlobo Osenyongweni’

Kubalulekile ukuba uhlakulele ukuba kubekho ukuthembana phakathi kwakho nabantwana bakho. UYehova “ungumhlobo osenyongweni” wabantwana bakhe abasemhlabeni. (Yeremiya 3:4) Ngaba ungumhlobo osenyongweni womntwana wakho? Ngaba ngokwenene uyamphulaphula umntwana wakho? Ngaba umntwana wakho uziva ekhululekile ukuba azise iingxaki zakhe kuwe? Ngaba uyakhawuleza ukumgxeka kunokuba umncome? Zinike ixesha lokuba umazi kakuhle umntwana wakho. Ngaba unabo abahlobo? Ngoobani abahlobo bakhe? Ngapha koko, iBhayibhile iyalumkisa: “Unxulumano olubi lonakalisa imikhwa elungileyo.” (1 Korinte 15:33) Musa ukoyika ukumisela imiqathango engqongqo okanye ukunikela uqeqesho ngokunothando. IBhayibhile ithi: “Mbethe unyana wakho yaye uya kukuzisela ukuphumla awuyolise umphefumlo wakho.”—IMizekeliso 29:17.

Ngapha koko, musa ukuzithabatha lula iingozi ajamelene nazo umntwana wakho. Abanye abazali basenokungazikhathazi beqiqa ngelithi ngenxa yokuba abantwana babo bephuma kwintsapho ehloniphekileyo, abalulo uhlobo olunokusebenzisa iziyobisi. Kodwa uGqr. José Henrique Silveira uthi: “Umntu othengisa iziyobisi uyathanda ukwakha ubuhlobo nabantwana babantu abaziwayo ngenxa yokuba oko kuyingenelo kwishishini lakhe.” Ewe, ukuba umntwana ohloniphekileyo unokulukuhlelwa ekubeni asebenzise iziyobisi, olunye ulutsha lunokumlandela.

Ngoko sebenzisa ingqiqo. Ziqonde iimpawu zomntu osandul’ ukuqalisa ukusebenzisa iziyobisi. Ngokomzekelo, ngaba umntwana wakho usuke waba ngumnyewu, uhlala edandathekile, enengcwangu okanye enenkani? Ngaba usuke wazikhwebula kubahlobo bakhe bangaphambili okanye kumalungu entsapho? Ngoko umele uxhalabe.

Okulusizi kukuba, nakuba abazali besenza imigudu yokukhusela abantwana babo, abanye abantwana bayanikezela baze babandakanyeke ekusebenziseni iziyobisi. Ufanele wenze ntoni xa oku kusenzeka emntwaneni wakho?

Xa Osemtsha Esebenzisa Iziyobisi

UIreneu uthi: “Abazali bam baqala ukuphawula ukuba umninawa wam usebenzisa iziyobisi emva kweenyanga eziliqela. Ngenxa yokuba bengazange bacinge ukuba omnye wabantwana babo unokuba likhoboka leziyobisi, ukuqala kwabo ukuphawula oko, babesenza izinto ngokungxama. Ekuqaleni, utata wayemohlwaya ngendlela engqwabalala umninawa wam.”

Xa abazali befumanisa ukuba umntwana wabo usebenzisa iziyobisi, ekuqaleni banokuba nomsindo, badandatheke yaye bazive besilele ngandlel’ ithile. Noko ke, uxwebhu olwapapashwa yiU.S. Department of Education lunikela la macebiso: “Musa ukudyuduzela! Yaye musa ukuzibek’ ityala. Eyona nto ibalulekileyo kukuba uzole [uze] uzame ukuqonda ukuba kwenzeka ntoni. . . . Umkhwa wokusebenzisa iziyobisi unokuthintelwa. Ukukhotyokiswa ziziyobisi sisifo esinokunyangeka.”

Ewe, yiba nobubele kodwa ube ngqongqo ukuze imeko ingabi mandundu. Ukuba nomsindo okanye ukudandatheka kunokubangela ukuba imeko yomntwana wakho ingalungi. Kwakhona, ufuna ukunceda umntwana wakho akhule ukuze akwazi ukusingatha iimbopheleleko, akwazi nokuzenzela izigqibo. Ngenxa yoko, zinike ithuba lokuqiqa nomntwana wakho ukuze umncede abone iingenelo zokungasebenzisi iziyobisi. Zama ukuqonda oko kusentliziyweni yomntwana wakho onxaxhayo, yaye zimisele ukuphulaphula.—IMizekeliso 20:5.

UIreneu uhlabela mgama esithi: “Kamva, abazali bam batshintsha indlela ababehlangabezana ngayo nale meko yaye baqalisa ukunikela ulwalathiso kumninawa wam, bamisela imiqathango ngokuphathelele iindawo anokuya kuzo, batshintsha namaxesha anokuya ngawo esikolweni ukuze angadibani nabantwana abanye yonke imihla. Bammisela imiqathango ngokuphathelele abantu anxulumana nabo yaye banikela ingqalelo engakumbi kuye nakwintsapho iphela.”

Phawula indlela abanye abazali abaye bangenelela ngayo xa befumanisa ukuba abantwana babo basebenzisa iziyobisi.

Ukungenelela Kwabazali

Enye indoda egama linguMarcelo, ehlala eSão Paulo, eBrazil ithi: “Yeyona nto ibuhlungu kwezakha zasehlela. Mna nonkosikazi wam asizange siphawule ukuba kukho undonakele koonyana bethu ababini abaselula. Ngokufuthi, babehamba baye kutya kwiivenkile zokutyela nelinye iqela lolutsha esasicinga ukuba silwazi kakuhle. Sakhathazeka ngeyona ndlela xa omnye umhlobo wethu wasixelela ukuba oonyana bethu batshaya intsangu. Noko ke, xa sibabuza bakhawuleza bavuma ukuba bayayitshaya.”

UMarcelo wahlangabezana njani nalo mkhwa woonyana bakhe? Uthi: “Mna nonkosikazi wam asizange sikwazi ukuzifihla ukuba sikhathazekile. Nangona sasikugatya ukusebenzisa kwabo iziyobisi sabaphatha ngendlela eqhelekileyo. Savumelana ukuba usukelo lwethu kukunceda oonyana bethu bahlukane nomkhwa wokusebenzisa iziyobisi. Sazichaza ngokuphandle iinjongo zethu yaye bobabini oonyana basamkela isigqibo esifikelele kuso. Babeza kuqhubeka befunda yaye babeza kuqhubeka besebenza nam kwishishini lethu. Babengazukuphinda bahambe baye kuzonwabisa bodwa. Sasibabonisa yonke imihla ukuba siyabathanda, kungekhona ngezihlandlo nje ezithile. Ekubeni umsebenzi wam ikukwakha, amaxesha amaninzi ndandihamba nabo xa ndisiya emsebenzini. Sawanandipha ngakumbi loo mathuba, sasiye sincokole ngekamva nangemfuneko yokuzibekela usukelo ebomini.” Ngaloo ndlela, uMarcelo nenkosikazi yakhe bakwazi ukubanceda oonyana babo bayeka ukusebenzisa iziyobisi.

Nanga amava omnye utata waseBrazil. Unyana wakhe uRoberto uthi: “Xa uTata wafumanisa ukuba umninawa wam usebenzisa iziyobisi, akazange amgxeke ngokungqwabalala okanye amohlwaye, kunoko wazenza umhlobo wakhe yaye umninawa wam waba nentembelo kuye. Watsho wabazi nabahlobo bomninawa wam neendawo awayethanda ukuya kuzo, yaye waqalisa ukuqiqa naye ngelithi akuyomfuneko ukuba asebenzise iziyobisi kungeyomfuneko nokuba abe nabahlobo abanjalo. UTata wamxelela ukuba akazimiselanga kungalali ebusuku ekhangelana naye.” Izama ukunceda lo mfana usengxakini, inkosikazi kayise yamxhasa umyeni wayo. Bobabini bavumelana ukuba baqale ngoko nangoko ukunceda lo mfana yaye bagqiba ekubeni bamncede elapho ekhaya.—Bona ibhokisi ethi “Ukufumana Uncedo.”

Musa Ukunikezela!

Ukukhulisa abantwana ‘kula maxesha amanqam ekunzima ukujamelana nawo’ kunokuba nzima yaye kunokuba lucelomngeni. (2 Timoti 3:1) Ukanti, ufanele uzinyamekele uze unikele ingqalelo nakwiintswelo zakho zokomoya. (Mateyu 5:3) Hayi indlela ayinyaniso ngayo amazwi akwiMizekeliso 24:10, athi: “Ngaba uzibonakalise udimazekile ngomhla wokubandezeleka? Uya kuphelelwa ngamandla.” Unokomelezwa kukunxulumana namaKristu okwenyaniso. Kwiintlanganiso zamaNgqina kaYehova eziqhutyelwa kwiHolo yoBukumkani, unokufumana inkxaso nokhuthazo.—Hebhere 10:24, 25.

Eneneni, ukufundisa intsapho yakho ukuba nokholo kuThixo kunokuba yeyona ndlela ibalaseleyo yokuyikhusela ekusebenziseni iziyobisi. Kakade ke, uThixo akalunyanzeli ulutsha ukuba luphile ngendlela ethile. Kodwa unikela icebiso elihle. Njengoko iNdumiso 32:8 isitsho, uThixo uthi: “Ndiya kukuqiqisa ndikuyalele ngendlela ofanele uhambe ngayo. Ndiya kukucebisa iliso lam likuwe.” NjengoBawo wasezulwini onothando, uThixo ufuna ukulukhusela ulutsha ukuze lungenzakali ngokweemvakalelo, emzimbeni nangokomoya. (IMizekeliso 2:10-12) Qiniseka ukuba uThixo uya kubanceda aze abaxhase abazali abazimisele ukukhulisela abantwana babo “kwingqeqesho nasekweyiselweni kwengqondo kuYehova.”—Efese 6:4.

Sekunjalo, ukukhulisa abantwana kweli hlabathi kunokuba nzima maxa wambi. Ngaba likho ithemba lokuba abazali baya kuze baphumle?

[Umbhalo osemazantsi]

[Amagama acatshulweyo akwiphepha 8]

“Umkhwa wokusebenzisa iziyobisi unokuthintelwa. Ukukhotyokiswa ziziyobisi sisifo esinokunyangeka.”—IU.S. DEPARTMENT OF EDUCATION

[Ibhokisi ekwiphepha 6]

Ukufumana Uncedo

Abanye abazali basenokugqiba kwelokuba kubhetele umntwana wabo afumane uncedo lwezonyango ukuze ahlukane nomkhwa wokusebenzisa iziyobisi. Ngabazali abaya kwenza isigqibo ngohlobo abalukhethayo. Kodwa ekubeni inkonzo enikelwa kwiikliniki ezahlukahlukeneyo ingafani, kuya kuba kuhle ukuba abazali benze uphando ngaphambi kokuba bafune uncedo kuloo kliniki. Ngokutsho kuka-Arthur Guerra de Andrade ongugqirha wengqondo nonjingalwazi kwiSão Paulo University yaseBrazil, kubantu abafumana uncedo kwiikliniki, bangama-30 ekhulwini kuphela abancedwa bahlukane nomkhwa wokusebenzisa kakubi iziyobisi. Ngaloo ndlela, abazali bafanele babonakalise umdla kuncedo olunikelwa kubantwana babo, kwanaxa bencedwa kumaziko ezonyango.

[Ibhokisi/Imifanekiso ekwiphepha 7]

Ukuncedwa Kwabantu Abazama Ukwahlukana Nomkhwa Wokusebenzisa Iziyobisi

Ngaba ungumntu osemtsha ozama ukwahlukana nomkhwa wokusebenzisa iziyobisi? Ukuba kunjalo, uya kufumanisa ukuba ukufunda iBhayibhile nokusebenzisa oko ukufundayo kunokukunceda kwimigudu yakho. Uya kukufumanisa kuluncedo ngakumbi ukufunda incwadi yeeNdumiso, kuba ineendinyana ezininzi ezivakalisa amazwi omntu osentlungwini njengoko nawe usentlungwini. Kuya kukunceda nokuthandaza kuThixo ngokunyanisekileyo, uphalaze imbilini yakho kuye. (Filipi 4:6, 7) Uya kuqalisa ukuva ukuba ukukhathalele ngokwenene yaye ufuna ukuba uphumelele. Kodwa ekubeni uThixo enganyanzeli mntu ukuba enze into angayithandiyo, kubalulekile ukuba ube nomdla ngokwenene wokwahlukana nomkhwa wokusebenzisa iziyobisi. Umdumisi uDavide, owaxhaswa nguThixo amaxesha amaninzi, wathi: “Ndithembele kuYehova ngokunyaniseka, waza wayithobela kum indlebe yakhe wakuva ukukhalela kwam uncedo. Kwakhona wandinyusa wandikhupha emhadini ogqumayo, eludakeni lomgxobhozo. Wandula ke waluvelisa unyawo lwam engxondorheni; wawamisela ngokuqinileyo amanyathelo am.” (INdumiso 40:1, 2) Namhlanje, abo banqwenela ukwahlukana nemikhwa engafanelekanga baze bakhonze uThixo bafumana inkxaso efanayo.

[Umfanekiso okwiphepha 5]

“Utata wayesilumkisa ngeengozi zokusebenzisa iziyobisi”—Alecxandros

[Umfanekiso okwiphepha 8]

Umele ubalumkise abantwana bakho kuba ukusebenzisa iziyobisi kunokuchaphazela impilo yabo emzimbeni nangokomoya

[Umfanekiso okwiphepha 8]

Bazi abantu anxulumana nabo umntwana wakho

[Umfanekiso okwiphepha 8, 9]

Ukuzola kunokuba luncedo ukuze ungayenzi ibe mandundu ngakumbi imeko