Ukuhlangabezana Nobulolo

UKUHLANGABEZANA nobulolo akunto ilula. Kubakho intlungu eyendeleyo. Umntu unokuhlangabezana njani nobulolo? Yintoni eye yenziwa ngabanye ukuze boyise le ntlungu?

Ukujamelana Nobulolo

UHelena uyathanda ukuba yedwa xa esenza izigqibo ezithile, kodwa uvakalelwa kukuba ubulolo bunokuba yingozi. Ngoxa wayesengumntwana, kwakungekho nxibelelwano phakathi kwakhe nabazali bakhe. Kuba engayazi indlela yokufumana ingqalelo yabo, wazivalela egumbini lakhe. Uthi: “Ndaqalisa ukutya ngendlela engalungelelananga. Ndadandatheka. Ndandidla ngokuthi, ‘Yintoni ebangela ukuba ndizikhathaze ngeengxaki zabazali bam ekubeni bona bengazikhathazi ngezam?’ Ngoko ndacinga ukuba xa ndinokutshata ndingayeka ukuba lilolo. Ndandifuna ukubalekela emtshatweni. Kodwa ngokukhawuleza ndaqiqa ngolu hlobo: ‘Kutheni ndifanele ndithwalise omnye umntu uxanduva? Okokuqala, kufuneka nditshintshe indlela endicinga ngayo!’ Ndathandaza ndicela uncedo kuYehova, ndazityand’ igila kuye ndichaza intlungu yam.

“Ndafumana amazwi athuthuzelayo eBhayibhileni njengala akuIsaya 41:10 athi: ‘Musa ukoyika, kuba ndinawe. Musa ukubhekabheka, kuba ndinguThixo wakho. Ndiza kukuqinisa. Ndiza kukunceda ngokwenene. Ndiza kukubamba nkqi ngokwenene ngesandla sam sasekunene sobulungisa.’ La mazwi andinceda kakhulu kuba ndandivakalelwa ngokungathi andinatata. Namhlanje ndifunda iBhayibhile rhoqo ndize ndithandaze kuBawo osezulwini. Ndiye ndafunda indlela yokuhlangabezana nobulolo.”

Ukufelwa ngumntu omthandayo kubangela intlungu enokukhokelela kubulolo. ULuisa, oneminyaka eli-16 ubudala uvakalisa intlungu yakhe: “Utata wafa xa ndandineminyaka emihlanu ubudala. Ndabhenela kumakhulu ukuba andithuthuzele, kodwa andizange ndivakalelwe kukuba uyandithanda. Andizange ndithandwe ebuntwaneni bam, ngexesha kanye endandifuna uthando ngalo. Xa ndandimalunga neminyaka esibhozo nesithoba ubudala, ndazama ukuzibulala izihlandlo ezithathu. Ndandicinga ukuba intsapho yakowethu iya kutsho ikhululeke ngenxa yokuba umama wayetsala nzima esondla mna noodadewethu abathathu. Emva koko saqalisa ukunxulumana namaNgqina kaYehova. Isibini esiselula esitshatileyo sabonakalisa umdla wokwenene kum. Sasidla ngokuthi kum: ‘Siyakuxabisa yaye siyakuthanda ukuba kunye nawe.’ Amagama athi ‘Siyakuthanda ukuba kunye nawe’ andomeleza kakhulu. Maxa wambi andikwazi ukuxelela omnye umntu indlela endivakalelwa ngayo, kodwa xa ndifunda amanqaku apapashwe kwiMboniselo okanye uVukani! ndiye ndimbulele uYehova, kuba xa ndifunda ezi mpapasho ndiyayibona indlela andithanda ngayo. Ndenze iinguqulelo ezininzi. Namhlanje ndiyakwazi ukuncuma, yaye ndiyakwazi ukuchazela umama ngentlungu yam novuyo endinalo. Maxa wambi zikhe zibuye iingcinga ezibuhlungu kodwa akusafani nakuqala apho ndandiye ndizame ukuzibulala okanye ndiyeke ukubathethisa abo ndibathandayo. Ndisoloko ndikukhumbula oko kwathethwa ngumdumisi uDavide xa wathi: ‘Ke kaloku ndiza kuthetha ngenxa yabazalwana bam namaqabane am ndithi: “Ngamana kungakho uxolo phakathi kwakho.”’”—INdumiso 122:8.

UMartha uneminyaka engama-22 eqhawule umtshato, yaye ebudeni beli xesha uye wakhulisa umntwana. Uthi: “Ndiye ndizive ndingento yanto yaye ndililolo xa ndicinga ukuba ndiye ndasilela ekwenzeni okuthile.” Uhlangabezana njani nale mvakalelo? Uthi: “Ndifumanise ukuba eyona ndlela iphumelelayo yokuhlangabezana nale ngxaki kukuthetha ngayo kuYehova uThixo ngomthandazo ngoko nangoko. Xa ndithandaza ndiyazi ukuba andindedwa. UYehova undazi ngaphezu kokuba ndizazi. Ndizama neendlela endinokubonakalisa ngazo umdla kwabanye. Ubulungiseleli bexesha elizeleyo buyandinceda kakhulu ukuze ndikwazi ukulwa nodandatheko. Xa uthetha nabanye ngeentsikelelo zoBukumkani bukaThixo uze uphawule ukuba abo bantu baphulaphuleyo abanathemba kwaphela, uphawule nokuba ababoni sicombululo seengxaki zabo, ufumanisa ukuba unezizathu ezivakalayo zokufuna ukuphila uze uqhubeke usilwa nale mvakalelo.”

UElba, oneminyaka engama-93 ubudala onomntwana omnye okhonza njengomvangeli wasemazweni kwelinye ilizwe, usixelela ngendlela ahlangabezana ngayo nobulolo: “Xa intombi yam nomyeni wayo bafumana isimemo sokuya kwiSikolo SeBhayibhile seWatchtower saseGiliyadi, ndababona bezaliswe luvuyo kwaye nam ndavuyisana nabo. Kamva, xa bafumana isabelo sokuya kukhonza kwelinye ilizwe ndaqala ukucinga ngesiqu sam. Ndandisazi ukuba babengazukuba kufuphi nam, yaye ndaziva ndibuhlungu. Kum, le meko yafana naleyo kaYifeta nentombi yakhe ekuphela kwayo ekuthethwa ngayo kuBagwebi isahluko 11. Kwafuneka ndithandaze kuYehova ndilila, ndicela uxolo. Abantwana bam basoloko beqhagamshelana nam. Ndiyazi ukuba baxakekile kakhulu, kodwa enoba bakhonza phi na, basoloko bendazisa ngoko kuqhubekayo ebomini babo, besabelana nam ngamava abo kubulungiseleli basentsimini. Iileta zabo ndizifunda ndiziphindaphinde. Kuba ngathi ndithetha nabo rhoqo ngeveki, yaye ndinombulelo kakhulu ngoko. Nabadala abangamaKristu kwibandla endikulo basinyamekela kakuhle thina balupheleyo nabaneziphene, basoloko beqiniseka ukuba ikho inqwelo-mafutha yokusisa kwiintlanganiso zebandla yaye banyamekela nezinye iintswelo zethu. Abazalwana noodadewethu bokomoya ndibagqala njengentsikelelo evela kuYehova.”

Nawe Unokuhlangabezana Nobulolo

Enoba uselula okanye ukhulile, akutshatanga okanye utshatile, ungumntwana onabazali okanye uyinkedama, enoba ufelwe ngabathandekayo okanye ulilolo ngandlel’ ithile, zikho iindlela zokuhlangabezana nentlungu okuyo. UJocabed, intwazana ene-18 leminyaka ubudala ongomnye wentsapho emalungu mathandathu eyashiywa nguyise waya kwelinye ilizwe, uthi: “Thetha phandle! Kubalulekile ukuchaza indlela ovakalelwa ngayo. Xa singathethi akukho mntu uza kuyiqonda intlungu esikuyo.” Uthi: “Yeka ukucinga ngesiqu sakho kakhulu. Funa uncedo kubantu abaqolileyo kungekhona kulutsha ekusenokwenzeka ukuba luneengxaki ezingaphezulu kwezakho.” ULuisa okhankanywe ngaphambili uthi: “Ukuthandaza kuYehova uzityand’ igila kuye, kusinika uncedo esilufunayo ukuze sikwazi ukuphuma kwingxaki ebesingenathemba lakuphuma kuyo.” UJorge, owafelwa yinkosikazi yakhe, uchaza ngendlela ahlangabezana ngayo nobulolo: “Kufuneka unyamezelo. Ukubonakalisa umdla kwabanye kundinceda kakhulu. ‘Ukubonakalisa uvelwano’ xa uncokola nabanye kunokwenza incoko ibe nentsingiselo yaye kunokusinceda sibone iimpawu ezintle abanazo abanye abantu.”—1 Petros 3:8.

Zininzi izinto ezinokwenziwa ukuze kuliwe nobulolo. Kodwa ngaba ubulolo buya kuze buphele? Ukuba kunjalo, kuya kwenzeka njani oko? Le mibuzo iya kuphendulwa kwinqaku elilandelayo.

[Umbhalo osemazantsi]

[Amagama acatshulweyo akwiphepha 8]

“Ukuthandaza kuYehova uzityand’ igila kuye, kusinika uncedo esilufunayo ukuze sikwazi ukuphuma kwingxaki ebesingenathemba lakuphuma kuyo.”—ULuisa

[Ibhokisi/Imifanekiso ekwiphepha 7]

Oko Unokukwenza Ukuze Uhlangabezane Nobulolo

◼ Khumbula ukuba imeko yakho inokutshintsha, ayiyi kuhlala injalo kodwa yinto ebehlelayo nabanye abantu.

◼ Musa ukuba nolindelo lwezinto ezingaphaya kwamandla akho.

◼ Yaneliseka ngesiqu sakho.

◼ Hlakulela imikhwa emihle, ekutyeni nasekulolongeni umzimba uze ulale ngokwaneleyo.

◼ Xa uwedwa funda ukwenza izinto ezintsha uphucule nobuchule onabo.

◼ Kulumkele ukugqala abantu odibana nabo ngokusekelwe kwizinto ezakha zakwehlela ngaphambili.

◼ Yiba noxabiso ngabahlobo bakho nangeempawu ezikhethekileyo abanazo. Zabalazela ukuba neqela labahlobo abafanelekileyo. Funa amacebiso kubantu abadala nabanamava.

◼ Yenzela abanye izinto—bancumele, thetha ngobubele nabo, yabelana nabo ngengcamango ethile evela eBhayibhileni. Xa umntu evakalelwa kukuba ubalulekile kwabanye utsho akwazi ukulwisana nobulolo.

◼ Kuphephe ukuzakhela imibono ngabantu abadlala kwiimovie okanye kumabonwakude okanye kwi-Internet okanye abantu ekuthethwa ngabo ezincwadini, ube nombono wakho ungumhlobo wabo.

◼ Ukuba utshatile, musa ukulindela ukuba iqabane lakho lanelise zonke iimvakalelo zakho. Zifundise ukuba bhetyebhetye, ukunceda nokuxhasa iqabane lakho.

◼ Zifundise ukuthetha nabanye nokuphulaphula. Nikela ingqalelo kwabanye abantu nakwizinto abanomdla kuzo. Yiba novelwano.

◼ Yiqonde into yokuba ulilolo uze uthethe nomhlobo oqolileyo, umntu onokumthemba. Musa ukuthula nje unyamezele.

◼ Kuphephe ukusela ngokugqithiseleyo okanye musa ukusela kwaukusela. Utywala abuziphelisi iingxaki zakho—ekuhambeni kwexesha ziyabuya kwakhona.

◼ Kuphephe ukuba nekratshi. Baxolele abo bakonayo, uzilungise iingxaki phakathi kwakho nabo. Musa ukuthanda ukuzithethelela ngalo lonke ixesha.

[Umfanekiso okwiphepha 6]

Umntu unokuhlangabezana njani nobulolo?