Bazali—Fundisani Abantwana Benu
“Ekuphela kwento eyayikade isixhalabisa yayilixesha elininzi elichithwa kubukelwe umabonwakude. Kodwa ngoku sinemidlalo yevidiyo, iikhompyutha neeselfowuni. Abantwana abaselula baba ngamakhoboka azo yaye baba nengxaki yokuziphatha . . . Iingqondo zabo ziqhela kakhulu ukuva nokubona izinto—yaye xa zingekho ezo zinto abayazi into amabayenze.”—UMali Mann, M.D.
NGENXA yokuhambela phambili kwezobugcisa siphila kwihlabathi elinezinto ezininzi zonxibelelwano. Ulutsha oluninzi alukwazi ukuphuma endlini ngaphandle kwezinto zalo zobugcisa okanye iselfowuni. Njengokuba iya iphucuka indlela yokusebenzisa ezi zinto yaye zifikeleleka, ukuhambela phambili kwazo akuzi kuphela, nto leyo eza kubangela iingxaki ekukhokeleni, ekufundiseni nasekuqeqesheni abantwana.
Ezo ngxaki zinokuconjululwa kuphela xa abazali besenza izinto ezimbini ezibalulekileyo. Eyokuqala: Banokubona ukuba yinyaniso kwala mazwi afumaneka eBhayibhileni kwiMizekeliso 22:15 athi: “Ukumatha kubotshiwe entliziyweni yomntwana; intonga yokuqeqesha yokumkisa kuye.” (iBhayibhile yesiXhosa) Eyesibini: Mabayiqonde into yokuba ezobugcisa zinokuba luncedo okanye zibe yingozi, ngoko bamele babancede bazisebenzise kakuhle.
Qala Besebancinane!
Kumakhaya amaninzi, umntwana uqala ngomabonwakude ukuqhela izinto zobugcisa. Phofu ke, umabonwakude uba ngumgcini womntwana. Kodwa, ezinye iingcali zezigulo zengqondo zithi ukuba abantwana baqala besebancinane ukubukela umabonwakude yaye bambukela kakhulu, loo nto inokubenza bangabi nawo umdla wokwenza umthambo, bangakwazi ukwahlula phakathi kwezinto ezenzeka ngokoqobo namaphupha, bangakwazi ukulawula iimvakalelo zabo baze kamva bangakwazi nokunikela ingqalelo esikolweni. UGqr. Mali Mann uthi: “Kunokwenziwa impazamo yokuba kuthiwe abanye abantwana baneSigulo Sokungakwazi Ukunikela Ingqalelo okanye Ukungakwazi Ukunikela Ingqalelo Ngokupheleleyo Ngenxa Yokudlamka Kakhulu kude kuthiwe bane-bipolar.” Ngenxa yoko, abanye abantu abasemagunyeni bancomela ukuba abantwana abangaphantsi kweminyaka emibini bangambukeli umabonwakude.
UGqr. Kenneth Ginsburg osisithethi seAmerican Academy of Pediatrics uthi: “Eyona nto ibalulekileyo yenzekayo emntwaneni kwiminyaka yakhe yokuqala ebomini, kukwakha ubuhlobo obusenyongweni nabazali bakhe.” Obo buhlobo bakheka xa abazali bencokola, bedlala yaye bemfundela umntwana. Njengokuba abazali abaninzi besazi, abantwana abafundelwa rhoqo baye bakuthande ukufunda nto leyo ebalulekileyo ebomini babo.
Kubalulekile ukuba abantwana abaninzi bayazi ikhompyutha nezinye izinto zobugcisa. Kodwa ukuba uphawula ukuba abantwana bakho bahleli nje bathe ntshoo ekhompyutheni, kwimidlalo yayo, kwi-Internet nezinye izinto zobugcisa kububulumko ukubabonisa ezinye izinto abanokuba nomdla kuzo. Unokukwenza njani oko? Unokubafundisa ubuchule obuthile okanye ukudlala isixhobo somculo—nayo nantoni na eyahlukileyo enokubakha.
Ukwenza okuthile okwahlukileyo akuyi kubahlaziya nje kuphela. Kunobakunceda babe nomonde, bazimisele, bazeyise baze babe nobuchule xa besenza izinto—mpawu ezo ezibalulekileyo ukuze umntu aphumelele ebomini kuba iingxaki aziconjululwa ngokucofa nje ikhompyutha.
Abantwana Bafuna “Ubulumko Namandla Okucinga”
EBhayibhileni, abantu abadala nabantwana bafundiswa ukuba babe ‘namandla engqiqo’ okanye amandla okucinga. (Roma 12:1; IMizekeliso 1:8, 9; 3:21) Ngenxa yoko, asaneli nje ukwazi ukwahlula okulungileyo kokubi kodwa siyakwazi ukwenza izigqibo zobulumko, siphephe ukwenza ezo zobuyatha. Ngokomzekelo, akukho nto iphosakeleyo ngokuchitha ixesha elininzi udlala imidlalo yekhompyutha okanye ubukele umabonwakude kodwa ngaba oko kububulumko? Akwaphuli mthetho xa uthenga izinto zakutshanje zobugcisa, kodwa ngaba bubulumko ukwenjenjalo? Ngoko, unokubanceda njani abantwana bakho benze isigqibo sobulumko ngezobugcisa?
◼ Bachazele ngeengozi. Abantwana bayakhawuleza ukuyazi indlela ezisebenza ngayo izinto zobugcisa neInternet, kodwa ngenxa yokuswela ubulumko namava baye bazithathe lula izinto. Ngenxa yoko, baxelele ngeengozi nendlela yokuziphepha. Ngokomzekelo, cinga nje ngombandela wokuzenzela abahlobo kwi-Internet. Kuyavunywa ukuba ukwenjenjalo kwenza kube lula ngabantwana ukuba bachaze iinkcukacha zabo baze banxibelelane nolunye ulutsha, kodwa kukho nabo baxhaphaza abantwana ngokwesini nabantu abaneenjongo ezimbi.a (1 Korinte 15:33) Ngoko ke, abazali abalumkileyo bakhuthaza abantwana babo ukuba bangazichazi iinkcukacha eziyimfihlelo kwi-Internet.b
Kakade ke, abantwana banelungelo lokuzenzela izinto zabo yaye oko kuxhomekeka kubudala babo. Kodwa njengomzali unegunya olinikwe nguThixo nembopheleleko yokuqeqesha abantwana bakho. (IMizekeliso 22:6; Efese 6:4) Sinethemba lokuba xa usenjenjalo akuyi kubenza bacinge ukuba ufuna ukwazi yonke into abayenzayo, kodwa wenza oko kuba ubathanda.
Kodwa unokuthi: “Ndinokubanceda njani abantwana bam ekubeni ndingazi nowathwethwa ngezi zinto?” Ngoko unokuqalisa ukufunda ezona zinto zilula. UMelba osele edlule kwiminyaka engama-90 ubudala waqalisa ukusebenzisa ikhompyutha sele engaphezu kweminyaka engama-80 ubudala. Uthi: “Ukuqala kwam ukuyisebenzisa ndandifuna ukuyilahla ngapha kwefestile. Emva kweenyanga ezimbalwa ndakwazi ukuyisebenzisa kangangokuba ngoku kulula ukuba ndithumele ie-mail nezinye izinto.”
◼ Basikele ixesha abanokulisebenzisa kwizinto zobugcisa. Ukuba umntwana wakho uzivalela yedwa ixesha elide ebukele umabonwakude, ekwi-Internet, okanye edlala imidlalo yekhompyutha, beka ixesha ezinokusetyenziswa ngalo ezi zinto. Oku kunokunceda umntwana wakho abone ukubaluleka komgaqo weBhayibhile othi: “Yonke into inexesha layo elimisiweyo.” Loo nto ithetha ukuba kukho ixesha lokuba kunye nentsapho, elokuba kunye nabahlobo, elokwenza umsebenzi wesikolo wasekhaya, elokutya, elokwenza umthambo nelokwenza ezinye izinto. (INtshumayeli 3:1) Imithetho enjalo nebethelelwa rhoqo ilungelelanisa ubomi bentsapho ize incede abantwana babe nembeko, babacingele abanye baze bakwazi ukwakha ubuhlobo.
Kwinqaku lokugqibela kolu ngcelele lwamanqaku, siza kufunda ngemigaqo enokusinceda—abantu abadala nabantwana—sisebenzise ezobugcisa ngendlela efanelekileyo nelinganiselweyo.
[Imibhalo esemazantsi]
a Abazali baya kuncedwa kukufunda inqaku elinomxholo othi “Abantwana Abasebenzisa I-Internet—Oko Kufanele Kwaziwe Ngabazali,” elikuVukani! kaOktobha 2008. Kanti kuVukani! kaMatshi, okaDisemba 2007 nokaJanuwari 2008 baya kuncedwa ngamanqaku athetha ngemifanekiso engamanyala, ngemidlalo yevidiyo nangeInternet.
b Kwakhona olunye ulutsha olukwishumi elivisayo luthumelelana imifanekiso engcolileyo ngeeselfowuni zalo. Oko akuthobi sidima nje kuphela kodwa kukwabubudenge kuba kungakhathaliseki ukuba yintoni injongo yalowo uyithumelayo, le mifanekiso iphela ithunyelelwa nabanye abantu.
[Umfanekiso okwiphepha 7]
Abantwana kufuneka benze izinto ezahlukahlukeneyo eziza kwenza ingqondo yabo iphangalale baze bafunde ukuba nomonde nokuzimisela xa besenza izinto