Ngaba Uzithelekisa Nabanye?

NGUBANI ongazange adibane nomntu omhle kunaye, othandwa kakhulu, okrelekrele nophuma emagqabini kumsebenzi wesikolo? Kusenokwenzeka ukuba abanye basempilweni kunathi okanye banomsebenzi owanelisayo, baphumelela ngakumbi okanye kubonakale ngathi banabahlobo abangakumbi. Kusenokwenzeka ukuba banezinto ezingakumbi, imali engakumbi, imoto entsha okanye basenokubonakala bonwabe ngakumbi. Xa siphawula izinto ezinjalo, ngaba sizithelekisa nabanye? Ngaba kunokwenzeka ukuba abantu bangazithelekisi? Kutheni umKristu efanele akuphephe ukuzithelekisa nabanye? Yaye sinokwaneliseka njani size singazithelekisi nabanye?

Isizathu Sokuba Abantu Bazithelekise Naxa Kufanelekile

Esinye isizathu esibangela abanye abantu bazithelekise nabanye kukuba kubenza bahlale benesidima. Abantu badla ngokwaneliseka ukufumanisa ukuba bayaphumelela njengoontanga babo. Esinye isizathu sesokuba ukuzithelekisa nabanye kunciphisa ukungazithembi, siqonde oko sinako ukukwenza size sizazi neentsilelo zethu. Siqwalasela oko kuye kwafikelelwa ngabanye ebomini. Ukuba bafana nathi kwiimeko ezininzi yaye baye bafikelela izinto ezithile, sinokuvakalelwa kukuba nathi sinokulufikelela usukelo olufanayo.

Ngokuqhelekileyo abantu bazithelekisa nabantu abafana nabo—abantu besini esifanayo, oontanga, nabantu abakumgangatho ofanayo nabazanayo. Asifane sizithelekise nomntu owahluke kakhulu kuthi. Ngokomzekelo, intombazana ekwishumi elivisayo ayinakufane izithelekise nonobuhle odumileyo kodwa izithelekisa nabantwana abafunda nayo, yaye naloo nobuhle akanakuzithelekisa nale ntombazana.

Ziziphi iinkalo abantu abazithelekisa kuzo? Nantoni na egqalwa njengexabisekileyo ekuhlaleni—enoba bubukrelekrele, ubuhle, ubutyebi, impahla—inokubangela ukuba abantu bazithelekise nabanye. Noko ke, sidla ngokuzithelekisa nabanye kwizinto esinomdla kuzo. Ngokomzekelo, asinakummonela umntu oqokelela izitampu ezininzi kunathi ngaphandle kokuba nathi sinomdla ekuqokeleleni izitampu.

Ukuzithelekisa nabanye kubangela iimvakalelo ezahlukahlukeneyo, kusenokubangela ubani aneliseke okanye adandatheke, kumbangele athande aze afune ukuxelisa omnye umntu okanye kumbangele angonwabi aze abamonele abanye. Ezinye zezi mvakalelo zinokwenzakalisa, yaye azivisisani neempawu zamaKristu.

Ukukhuphisana

Abantu abaninzi abathanda ukuba “baphumelele” xa bezithelekisa nabanye banomoya wokhuphiswano. Bafuna ukuba bhetele kunabanye, yaye abaneliseki de bavakalelwe kukuba babhetele. Akumnandanga ukuba phakathi kwabantu abanjalo. Abantu ababi nolwalamano oluhle nabo. Abantu abanjalo abanakratshi nje kuphela kodwa badla ngokusilela ekusebenziseni isiluleko seBhayibhile sokuthanda abanye abantu, ekubeni isimo sabo sengqondo sinokubangela abanye bazive bebancinane yaye behlazwa.—Mateyu 18:1-5; Yohane 13:34, 35.

Ukwenza abanye bavakalelwe kukuba “bengoongantweni” kuyabenzakalisa. Omnye umbhali uthi, “sikubona ngakumbi ukusilela kwethu xa kubonakala ukuba abantu abakwimeko efanayo neyethu baye bafumana izinto esizifunayo.” Ngoko ke, umoya wokhuphiswano ubangela umona, ingqumbo nokungamthandi umntu othile ngenxa yezinto anazo, inkqubela ayenzayo, isikhundla akuso, into adume ngayo, amathuba okwenza izinto ezithile nezinye izinto. Oku kukhokelela kumoya ongakumbi wokhuphiswano—nto leyo engapheliyo. IBhayibhile iyakugweba ‘ukukhuphisana.’—Galati 5:26.

Ngokuyigxeka nantoni na eyenziwe ziintshaba zabo, abantu abanomona bazama ukugcina isidima sabo. Oku kusenokubonakala kuyinto encinane, kodwa ukuba asenzi nto ukukulungisa, kunokusenza senze into embi gqitha. Cinga ngeengxelo ezimbini eziseBhayibhileni zabantu ababenomona.

Xa wayehlala namaFilisiti, uIsake wayesikelelwa ‘ngemihlambi yezimvu nemihlambi yeenkomo nabakhonzi abaninzi, kangangokuba amaFilisti ammonela.’ Awavingca amaqula awombiwe nguyise, uAbraham, yaye ukumkani wawo wamgxotha uIsake kuloo ndawo. (Genesis 26:1-3, 12-16) Umona ababenawo wababangela benza isenzo senkohlakalo yaye wawuyingozi. Babengakuthandi ukubona uIsake esenza inkqubela phakathi kwabo.

Kwiinkulungwane kamva, uDavide wabalasela edabini. Wadunyiswa ngamabhinqa akwaSirayeli ngenxa yoko wakwenzayo, aza acula esithi: “USawule uxabele amawaka akhe, noDavide amashumi akhe amawaka.” Nangona naye wayezukiswa ngokomlinganiselo othile, uSawule wayevakalelwa kukuba ujongelwa phantsi xa ethelekiswa noDavide, yaye oko kwambangela wanomona. Ukususela ngoko, wamzonda uDavide. Kungekudala waqalisa iphulo lokufuna ukumbulala uDavide. Ngokwenene umona unokubangela ububi!—1 Samuweli 18:6-11.

Ngoko ke xa ukuzithelekisa nabanye—izenzo zabo okanye oko bakuphumezileyo—kusibangela ukuba sibe nomona okanye sikhuphisane, lumka! Oku kuyingozi, yaye uThixo akafuni ukuba siwele kulo mgibe. Kodwa ngaphambi kokuba sibone indlela esinokuziphepha ngayo iimvakalelo ezinjalo, makhe sihlolisise enye into ebangela ukuba sizithelekise nabanye.

Ukuzihlolisisa Nokwaneliseka

‘Ngaba ndikrelekrele, ndimhle, ndinobuchule obuthile, ndisempilweni, ndiyahlonelwa yaye ndiyathandwa? Yaye ezi zinto ndinazo ukusa kuwuphi umkhamo?’ Asifane sime phambi kwesipili size sizibuze imibuzo enjalo. Sekunjalo, omnye umbhali uthi, “ngokuqinisekileyo, imibuzo enjalo ibakho ezingqondweni zethu yaye ifuna siyiphendule ngendlela eyanelisayo.” Umntu ongaqinisekanga ngoko anokukuphumeza unokucinga ngezi zinto ngaphandle kokukhuphisana nomnye umntu okanye ammonele. Uyazihlolisisa nje. Akukho nto iphosakeleyo ngokwenjenjalo. Noko ke, indlela efanelekileyo yokwenjenjalo asikokuzithelekisa nabanye.

Ubuchule obahlukahlukeneyo esinabo buxhomekeke kwizinto eziliqela. Baya kuhlala bekho abantu ekubonakala ngathi benza bhetele kunathi. Ngoko ke, kunokuba sibamonele, kufuneka siphile ngokwemigaqo kaThixo yobulungisa, migaqo leyo esibonisa okulungileyo nokubi. UYehova unomdla kuthi ngamnye wethu. Akasithelekisi nabanye. Umpostile uPawulos usicebisa ngelithi: “Ngamnye makangqine oko ukuko umsebenzi wakhe, uya kwandula ke abe nesizathu sokugcoba ngaye siqu, kungekhona ngokuzithelekisa nomnye umntu.”—Galati 6:4.

Ukulwa Nomona

Ekubeni bonke abantu bengafezekanga, kusenokufuneka sihlale sisenza umgudu ukuze silwe nomona. Kuyenye into ukwazi ukuba iZibhalo zithi: “Ekuboniseni imbeko omnye komnye khokelani,” kodwa kuyenye into ukukwenza oko. UPawulos wazibona indlela atyekele ngayo esonweni. Ukuze alwe naso, kwafuneka ‘awuqobe umzimba wakhe aze awuphathe njengekhoboka.’ (Roma 12:10; 1 Korinte 9:27) Oku kunokuthetha ukuba sikuphephe ukucinga ngokukhuphisana, size sicinge izinto ezakhayo. Sifanele sithandaze, sicele uYehova asincede ‘singazicingeli ngaphezu koko simelwe kukuzicingela ngako.’—Roma 12:3.

Kwakhona ukufunda iBhayibhile nokucamngca kuluncedo. Ngokomzekelo, cinga ngeParadesi yexesha elizayo uThixo asithembise yona. Ngeloo xesha, bonke abantu baya kuba seluxolweni, empilweni, babe nentabalala yokutya, amakhaya atofotofo nemisebenzi eyanelisayo. (INdumiso 46:8, 9; 72:7, 8, 16; Isaya 65:21-23) Ngaba abantu baya kufuna ukukhuphisana? Akunjalo. Asikho isizathu esiya kubangela oko. Liyinyaniso elokuba, uYehova akasinikanga zonke iinkcukacha zokuba ubomi buya kuba njani ngelo xesha, kodwa kusengqiqweni ukucinga ukuba bonke abantu baya kukwazi ukufeza izinto abanomdla kuzo nokuba ngamagcisa kwizinto abazithandayo. Omnye umntu unokufundela inzululwazi ngeenkwenkwezi, omnye unokwenza amalaphu amahle. Sisiphi isizathu esinokubangela umntu amonele omnye? Izinto ezenziwa ngabanye abantu ziya kusenza sifune ukwenza ezinye izinto yaye zingasibangeli ingqumbo. Imvakalelo ezinjalo ziya kuba zingasekho.

Ukuba sifuna ukuphila ngolo hlobo, ngaba asimele silwele ukuhlakulela isimo sengqondo esinjalo ngoku? Sele sikwiparadesi yokomoya, engenazo iingxaki ezininzi ezisehlabathini namhlanje. Ekubeni umoya wokukhuphisana uya kube ungasekho kwihlabathi elitsha likaThixo, simele siwuphephe ngoku.

Ngoko ke, ngaba kuphosakele ukuzithelekisa nabanye? Okanye zikho imeko ezibangela ukuba oko kufaneleke?

Ukuzithelekisa Okufanelekileyo

Abantu abaninzi abaye bazithelekisa nabanye baye baba buhlungu okanye badandatheka, kodwa oku akusoloko kunjalo. Ngokuphathelele oku, phawula icebiso likaPawulos: ‘Yibani ngabaxelisa abo bathi ngokholo nomonde bazidle ilifa izithembiso.’ (Hebhere 6:12) Kunokusinceda ukuzama ukuhlakulela iimpawu ababenazo abakhonzi abathembekileyo bakaYehova bamandulo. Liyinyaniso elokuba, oku kusenokuthetha ukuzithelekisa okuthile. Sekunjalo, kunokusinceda sibone imizekelo esinokuyixelisa nalapho sinokuphucula khona.

Cinga ngoYonatan. Omnye usenokuthi wayenesizathu esivakalayo sokuba nomona. Njengezibulo likaKumkani uSawule wakwaSirayeli, kusenokwenzeka ukuba uYonatan wayelindele ukuba abe ngukumkani, kodwa uYehova wakhetha indoda awayemdala kuyo ngeminyaka engama-30, umfana onguDavide. Kunokuba abe nenqala, uYonatan wabalasela ngenxa yobuhlobo bakhe bokungazingci waza wamxhasa uDavide njengokumkani onyulwe nguYehova. Ngokwenene uYonatan wayeyindoda eqolileyo ngokomoya. (1 Samuweli 19:1-4) Ngokungafaniyo noyise, owayengavani noDavide, uYonatan waqonda ukuba uYehova wayesalathisa izinto waza wakuthobela ukuthanda Kwakhe; akazange azithelekise noDavide, esithi, “Kutheni kunyulwe uDavide kunganyulwanga mna?”

Xa siphakathi kwamanye amaKristu, asifanele sizoyikisele, ngokungathi abanye bazama ukukhuphisana nathi. Ukhuphiswano alufanelekanga. AmaKristu aqolileyo aziwa ngentsebenziswano, umanyano nothando, kungekhona ngomoya wokhuphiswano. Esinye isazi ngentlalo uFrancesco Alberoni uthi: “Uthando lutshaba olukhulu lomona. Ukuba siyamthanda umntu othile, simnqwenelela okuhle loo mntu, yaye siyavuya xa ephumelela yaye onwabile.” Ngoko ke ukuba umntu othile ebandleni lamaKristu ufumana ilungelo elithile, kufanele sivuyisane naye. Wayenjalo uYonatan. Njengaye, siya kusikelelwa ukuba sixhasa abo bakhonza ngokuthembeka kwizikhundla zembopheleleko kwintlangano kaYehova.

Amanye amaKristu asenokuba ngumzekelo omhle esinokufuna ukuwuxelisa. Ukuzithelekisa ngendlela elungeleleneyo kunokusibangela sifune ukuxelisa ukholo lwabo ngendlela efanelekileyo. (Hebhere 13:7) Kodwa ukuba asilumkanga, ukuxelisa umntu othile kunokubangela ukhuphiswano. Ukuba sivakalelwa kukuba umntu othile esimhlonelayo uyasigqwesa kwinto ethile size sizame ukumjongela phantsi okanye simgxeke, kunokuba simxelise sinokummonela.

Akakho umntu ongafezekanga onokuxeliswa ngokupheleleyo. Ngoko ke, iZibhalo zithi: “Yibani ngabaxelisa uThixo, njengabantwana abaziintanda.” Kwakhona, “noKristu wabandezeleka ngenxa yenu, enishiya nomzekelo, ukuze nilandele emanyathelweni akhe ngokusondeleyo.” (Efese 5:1, 2; 1 Petros 2:21) Iimpawu uYehova noYesu abanazo—uthando lwabo, ububele, uvelwano nokuthobeka—koko sifanele sizabalazele ukukuxelisa. Sifanele siziphe ixesha size sikhangele ukuba thina siqhuba njani kwiimpawu, iinjongo neendlela zabo zokwenza izinto. Ukuzithelekisa okunjalo kunokwenza ubomi bethu bube nenjongo, siyazi eyona nto sifuna ukuyenza ebomini, sizinze size sizive sinqabisekile, yaye kunokusinceda sikwazi ukuba ngamadoda namabhinqa angamaKristu aqolileyo. (Efese 4:13) Ukuba sinikela ingqalelo ekwenzeni oko kusemandleni ethu ukuze sixelise umzekelo wabo ogqibeleleyo, ngokuqinisekileyo asinakufuna ukuzithelekisa nabanye abantu.

[Umfanekiso okwiphepha 28, 29]

UKumkani uSawule wammonela uDavide

[Umfanekiso okwiphepha 31]

UYonatan akazange amgqale njengotshaba uDavide owayeselula kunaye