Ibali Lobomi
Nangona Ndibuthathaka, Ndinamandla
KUBALISA ULEOPOLD ENGLEITNER
Igosa lamaNazi lathi rhuthu umkhonw’ ekati, lawubeka kum entloko, lathi: “Ukulungele ukufa? Ndiza kukudubula kuba akukho yakho.” “Ndikulungele,” ndatsho njalo, ndizama ukuziqinisa. Ndavala amehlo, ndilindele ukutsho kwesithonga, kodwa akuzange kwenzeke nto. Njengoko lalisusa loo mkhonw’ ekati ezintlafunweni lathi “wena akufanelwanga nakoko kufa usisidenge gqitha!” Kwakutheni ukuze ndibe sesichengeni sokufa ngaloo ndlela?
NDALIBONA ilanga ngoJulayi 23, 1905, kwidolophu yaseAigen-Voglhub, ekwiintaba zeAlps eOstriya. Ndandingunyana omdala womchweli wamaplanga yena umama eyintombi yomfama. Abazali bam babengathath’ intweni kodwa babekhuthele. Ndisengumntwana ndandihlala eBad lschl, ngaseSalzburg ummandla onamachibi amahle neentaba ezithi ndijonge.
Ndisakhula ndandikhathazwa kukungabikho kokusesikweni ebomini, ibe oko kwakungabangelwa kukuhlwempuzeka kwethu, kodwa kubangelwa kukuba ndazalwa ndinesifo somnqonqo. Umqolo wam wawuqaqamba kangangokuba ndandingakwazi ukuma nkqo. Esikolweni ndandingavunyelwa ukudlala umthambo ngenxa yoko ndaba yintlekisa kwabanye abantwana.
Ekupheleni kweMfazwe Yehlabathi I, ngaphambi nje kokuba ndibe neminyaka eli-14 ubudala, ndagqiba ekubeni ndizifunele umsebenzi ukuze ndahlukane nobuhlwempu. Ndandilamba, yaye ndibuthathaka ngenxa yefiva eyayibangelwa nguMbathalala owashiya itshoba lilel’ umbethe kwizigidi zabantu. Xa ndiye kufuna umsebenzi, amafama amaninzi ayesuka nje athi “singawuqesha njani umlwelwe onjengawe?” Noko ke, omnye umfama onobubele wandiqesha.
Ndachukunyiswa Kukufunda Ngothando LukaThixo
Nakuba uMama wayengumKatolika ovuthayo, ndandingafane ndiye ecaweni kuba utata wayengafuni mntu unyanzelwayo. Ndandingayithandi into yokunqulwa kwemifanekiso eyayigqugqise kwiCawa yamaRoma Katolika.
Ngenye imini ngo-Oktobha 1931, ndacelwa ngumhlobo wam ukuba ndimpheleke siye kwinkonzo yaBafundi beBhayibhile, indlela awayebizwa ngayo amaNgqina kaYehova ngezo mini. Kuloo ntlanganiso kwaphendulwa imibuzo ebalulekileyo endandinayo ngeBhayibhile, njengothi: Ngaba ukunqula imifanekiso kuyamkholisa uThixo? (Eksodus 20:4, 5) Ngaba sikho isihogo somlilo? (INtshumayeli 9:5) Ngaba abafileyo baza kuvuswa?—Yohane 5:28, 29.
Eyona nto yandichukumisa gqitha kukuva ukuba uThixo akakholiswa ziimfazwe, nokuba kuthiwa ziliwa egameni Lakhe. Ndafunda ukuba “uThixo uluthando” nokuba uYehova ligama lakhe eliphakamileyo. (1 Yohane 4:8; INdumiso 83:18) Ndavuyiswa gqitha kukuva ukuba xa kulawula uBukumkani bukaYehova abantu baza kuphila ngonaphakade bonwabile kumhlaba oyiparadesi. Ndafunda nangethemba elimangalisayo lokuba kukho abantu abangafezekanga uThixo abakhethileyo ukuze balawule noYesu kuBukumkani basezulwini. Ndandilungele ukwenza nantoni na ukuze ndizuze obo Bukumkani. NgoMeyi 1932 ndabhaptizwa ndaba liNgqina likaYehova. Elo nyathelo lalifuna inkalipho, kuba ngezo mini kwakukhonya amaKatolika yaye engayazi into yokunyamezela olunye unqulo eOstriya.
Ukujamela Nentiyo Nenkcaso
Abazali bam baxheleka gqitha ndakuyeka icawa, ibe nomfundisi akazange alibazise watshila ngaloo nto ecaweni. Abamelwane babetshica xa bedibana nam bebonisa ukusithiya kwabo eso sigqibo. Nakuba kunjalo, ndandizimisele ukungenelela inkonzo yexesha elizeleyo, ibe ndaba nguvulindlela othe ngxi ngoJanuwari 1934.
Imeko yezopolitiko yadala unxunguphalo olungathethekiyo ngenxa yempembelelo yamaNazi eyayikhula kwiphondo lethu. Xa ndandinguvulindlela eStyrian Valley e-Enns amapolisa ayesoloko endizingela ngoko kwakufuneka ‘ndilumke njengenyoka.’ (Mateyu 10:16) Ukususela ngowe-1934 ukusa kowe-1938 ndanditshutshiswa umhla nezolo. Nangona ndandingasebenzi, andizange ndisifumane isibonelelo sabantu abangasebenziyo, yaye ndagwetywa uthotho lwezigwebo ezifutshane nezigwebo ezine ezide entolongweni ngenxa yokushumayela.
Imikhosi KaHitler Ihlasela IOstriya
NgoMatshi 1938, imikhosi kaHitler yahlasela iOstriya. Akuzange kube kudala kwabe sekubanjwe kwavalelwa ngaphayaa kwezitshixo nakwiinkampu zoxinaniso abantu abangaphezu kwama-90 000—malunga nesi-2 ekhulwini kubantu abadala balapho—betyholwa ngokuvukela ulawulo lwamaNazi. AmaNgqina kaYehova ayesele ekulungele ukujamelana noko. Kwihlobo lowe-1937, iqela labazalwana bebandla endandikulo ngaphambili babeye kwindibano yezizwe ngezizwe eyayisePrague ngeebhayisekile malunga neekhilomitha ezingama-350. Kuloo ndibano beva ngentlungu yabazalwana bethu eJamani. Kwacaca mhlophe ukuba ngoku icekwa lalisele nathi.
Kususela kwimini eyathi cakatha umcondo ngawo imikhosi kaHitler eOstriya, kwanyanzeleka ukuba amaNgqina kaYehova aziqhube ngokufihlakeleyo iintlanganiso nomsebenzi wawo wokushumayela. Nakuba uncwadi sasiluthubelezisa lungene ngomda waseSwitzerland, lwalunganelanga. Ngoko amaKristu aseVienna alushicilela ngokufihlakeleyo. Ndandidla ngokuluthutha ndihambisele amaNgqina.
Kwinkampu Yoxinaniso
NgoAprili 4, 1939, mna namanye amaKristu amathathu sabanjwa ngamaGestapo ngoxa sasiqhuba iSikhumbuzo sokufa kukaKristu eBad Ischl. Sonke sakhweliswa kwinqwelo yabakwantsasana sasiwa kwikomkhulu lamapolisa eLinz. Ndandiqala ukukhwela imoto, kodwa andizange ndiyinandiphe kuba kwakunzima kum. ELinz, ndancinwa into engapheliyo, kodwa andizange ndilulahle ukholo lwam. Emva kweenyanga ezintlanu, ndasiwa; kwinkundla yamatyala yoMntla Ostriya. Ndingalindelanga, zarhoxiswa izityholo zolwaphulo-mthetho endandibekwa zona; kodwa oko, kwakungathethi ukuba ndikhululekile. Ngelo xesha, abanye abathathu basiwa kwiinkampu zoxinaniso, apho bafela khona besathembekile.
Ndagcinwa eziseleni ndaza ngo-Oktobha 5, 1939, ndaxelelwa ukuba ndiza kuthunyelwa kwinkampu yoxinaniso yaseBuchenwald eJamani. Sasilindwe nguloliwe okhethekileyo kwisikhululo saseLinz. Khareji ngalinye laloo loliwe lalinesisele esilungiselelwe abantu ababini. Kweso sam ndavalelwa nalowo wayesakuba yirhuluneli yoMntla Ostriya, uGqr. Heinrich Gleissner ngokwakhe.
Saqalisa incoko eyabangel’ umdla. Wayefuna ukuyazi ngokwenene eyona nto ndibanjelwe yona ibe wothuka akuva ukuba nangexesha lokuphatha kwakhe amaNgqina kaYehova ayephila ubomi bentshontsho kwiphondo lakhe. Wachaza ukuba uzisola gqitha ngoko, watsho esithi: “Mnu. Engleitner, andinakukwazi ukuzibuyisela umva izinto ezenzekileyo, kodwa ndicela uxolo. Oku kuthetha ukuba urhulumente wethu ubekek’ ityala ngokungabikho kokusesikweni. Ukuba ufuna naluphi na uncedo ndakwenza konke okusemandleni.” Sadibana kwakhona emva kwemfazwe. Wandinceda ndafumana imali yomhlala-phantsi efunyanwa ngamaxhoba ezenzo zamaNazi.
“Ndiza Kukudubula”
Ngo-Oktobha 9, 1939 ndaya kufakwa kwinkampu yoxinaniso yaseBuchenwald. Umgcini-mabanjwa walapho waxelelwa ukuba phakathi kwamabanjwa afikayo kukho neNgqina, ngoko wanikela ingqalelo kum. Wandibethela oogqirha nezicaka. Emva, kokubona ukuba akanakundahlukanisa nokholo lwam, wathi: “Engleitner ndiza kukudubula. Kodwa ngaphambi koko qala ubhalele abazali bakho ileta yokuthi ndlela-ntle.” Ndacinga ngamazwi anokuthuthuzela abazali bam, kodwa ndandithi xa ndiza kubhala andiqhokre engqinibeni suke ndibhale amarhoqololo. Wahlekisa ngam esithi: “Heyi sisimuncu umntu olapha! Akakwazi nokubhala oku. Ekuphela kwento ayaziyo kukufundana neBhayibhile?”
Umlindi wathi rhuthu umkhonw’ ekati waze wawubek’ entloko, endoyikisa efuna ndicinge ukuba uza kundibulala, njengokuba kuchazwe ekuqaleni. Emva koko, wandifaka ngenkani kwisisele esasiphuphuma kakade. Ndema ngeenyawo ubusuku bonke. Kakade ke ndandingenakukwazi ukulala kuba umzimba wam wawutshotshozela wonke. Ekuphela “kwentuthuzelo” yamabanjwa endivalelwe nawo yayiba ngala mazwi: “Kukungabi nangqondo kwaphela ukufela unqulo!” banditshabhisa batsho abo ndandivalelwe nabo. UGqr. Gleissner wayevalelwe kwisisele esilandelayo. Wakuva oko kwakusenzeka wathi: “Bayawaqalile kwakhona batshutshisa amaKristu ngolunya!”
Ngokuqhelekileyo ngeCawa sasingasebenzi kodwa ngehlobo lowe-1940, onke amabanjwa ayalelwa ukuba aye kusebenza ekwarini. Kwakusohlwaywa amabanjwa athile “anentlonti.” Sathuthiswa amatye amakhulu siwathabatha ekwarini siwasa enkampini. Amabanjwa amabini azama ukubeka ilitye elinzima emqolo ibe ndaphantsa, ndabuthisa. Noko ke, uArthur Rödl (umphathi wenkampu) owayesoyikwa wandihlangula kobo bugxwayiba. Wathi akubona indlela endisindwa ngayo wathi: “Awunakufika enkampini nelo litye! Lothule!” Kwatsho kweqabu. Wandibonisa elincinane wathi: “Chola eliya uye nalo enkampini. Kuza kuba lula ukuphatha lona!” Emva koko, wayalela umphathi wathi: “ABafundi beBhayibhile mababuyele eziseleni. Basebenze ngokwaneleyo namhlanje!”
Ekupheleni kosuku ngalunye ndandikuvuyela gqitha ukunxulumana nentsapho yam yokomoya. Sasinamalungiselelo okusasaza ukutya kokomoya. Umzalwana wayebhala indinyana yeBhayibhile kwisiqwengana sephepha aze asidlulisele kwabanye. Kukho neBhayibhile eyathutyeleziswa yafakwa apho enkampini. Sayahlulahlula ngokweencwadi zayo. Ndabelwa incwadi kaYobhi iinyanga ezintathu. Ndandiyifihla kwiikawusi zam. Ndomelezwa gqitha yingxelo ephathelele uYobhi.
NgoMatshi 7, 1941, ndaqukwa kwiqela elikhulu elafuduswa lasiwa kwinkampu yaseNiederhagen. Imeko yam yayisiba mandundu mihla le. Ngenye imini, mna nabazalwana ababini sanikwa umsebenzi wokupakisha izixhobo. Emva kwalo msebenzi, sapheleka elinye iqela lamabanjwa ukubuyela kwisigqubo somkhosi. Elinye ijoni labona ukuba ndishiyekela ngasemva. Lithe fixi ngumsindo landikhaba kanobom ndenzakala. Zaqala apho beziyeke khona iintlungu, kodwa ngosuku olulandelayo ndabuyela enkomeni.
Ukukhululwa Ngequbuliso
NgoAprili 1943, bada bafuduka bonke abantu ababekwinkampu yaseNiederhagen. Mna ndathunyelwa kwinkampu kafayayo eRavensbrück. Ndingalindelanga, kwathi ngoJuni 1943, ndakhululwa kwinkampu yoxinaniso. Kwesi isihlandlo, ndakhululwa ngaphandle kwemiqathango kukholo lwam. Kwakufuneka ndivume nje ukuya kusebenza efama ubomi bam bonke. Ndandikulungele ukwenza loo msebenzi ukuze ndiphuncule kumasikizi asenkampini. Ndasiwa kugqirha waloo nkampu ukuze andixilonge. Ugqirha wothuka akundibona. Wathi: “UseliNgqina likaYehova nangoku!” Ndaphendula ndathi “uchan’ ucwethe ndiselilo nangoku, Gqirha.” “Ekubeni useliNgqina andiqondi ukuba simele sikukhulule. Kodwa ke, kuya kuba kuhle ukwahlukana nomlwelwe onjengawe lo.”
Wayengazibaxi izinto xa esitsho. Ubomi bam babuphakathi kwenyama nozipho. Isikhumba sam sasiyucwe ziintwala, ngenxa yokubethwa ndasala ndivaleke enye indlebe, umzimba wawubole bhutyu zizilonda. Emva kweenyanga ezingama-46 zempatho-mbi, indlala nokusebenza ngesinyanzelo ndasala nobunzima nje obuziikhilogram ezingama-28. Ndandinjalo kanye ukukhululwa kwam kwinkampu yoxinaniso yaseRavensbrück ngoJulayi 15, 1943.
Ndabuyiselwa kwidolophu yakowethu ngololiwe ndihamba ndedwa, ndaya kuvela kwikomkhulu lamaGestapo eLinz. Igosa lamaGestapo landinika amaphepha okundikhulula landityityimbisel’ umwe lathi: “Ukuba ucinga ukuba sikukhulule ukuze uqhubeke nemisebenzi yakho yamathunz’ obumnyama utsho phantsi! UThixo akuncede singaze siphinde sikubambe ushumayela.”
Ekugqibeleni ndagaleleka ekhaya! Ndafika umama engazange atshintshe kwanto kwigumbi lam linjengokuba kanye ndalishiyayo ukubanjwa kwam, ngoAprili 4, 1939. Nkqu neBhayibhile yam yayisavulekile kwitafilana eyayisecaleni kwebhedi! Ndaguqa ngamadolo ndathandaza ndibulela.
Ngokukhawuleza ndanikwa umsebenzi kwifama esentabeni. Umfama owayengumhlobo wam kwasebuntwaneni wayede andihlawule umvuzwana othile nakuba wayenganyanzelekanga. Ngaphambi kwemfazwe, lo mhlobo wam wandivumela ukuba ndifihle uncwadi lweBhayibhile emzini wakhe. Lwandomeleza gqitha olo ncwadi ngokomoya. Zonke iintswelo zam zaneliswa, kwaye ndandikulungele ukusebenza kuloo fama de kudlule imfazwe.
Ukuzimela Ezintabeni
Noko ke, ezo ntsuku zenkululeko zakhawuleza zaphela. Phakathi kuAgasti 1943, ndayalelwa ukuba ndiye kuvela kugqirha womkhosi ukuze andixilonge. Ekuqaleni wathi, andinakulunga kwinkonzo yasemkhosini ngenxa yokuba umqolo wam ubuthathaka. Noko ke, emva kweveki ugqirha wabuya sele esithi: “Ndingumqabaqaba ndinokuthunyelwa phambili edabini.” Kangangexesha elithile umkhosi wawungazi ukuba ndiphi, ngaphambi nje kokuphela kwemfazwe, ngoAprili 17, 1945, umkhosi wandifumana. Ndathunyelwa emkhosini ukuba ndiye kulwa phambili edabini.
Ndiphethe impahla ezimbalwa nokutya okuncinane neBhayibhile, ndasabela kwiintaba ezikufutshane. Ekuqaleni ndandilala phandle, kodwa imozulu yatshintsha kwawa ikhephu elingangeemitha ezintlanu ukuphakama. Landitsho ndamanzi tixi. Ndaya kwindlu eyakhiwe ngezinti phezu kwentaba malunga neemitha ezili-1 200 ngaphezu komphakamo wolwandle. Ndiqhaqhazela yingqele, ndafika kukho umlilo, ndotha ndaze ndomisa nempahla yam. Ndidinwe ndiyimfe, ndabiwa bubuthongo phezu kwesitulo phambi kweziko. Akuzange kube kudala ndavuswa ziintlungu ezingathethekiyo. Impahla yam yayisitsha! Ndazibhuqa phantsi ndizama ukucima loo madangatya. Wonke umqulo wam wawunamadyunguza.
Ndisesichengeni sokubanjwa, ndachwechwa ndibuyela kuloo fama isentabeni ngaphambi kokuba kuthi qheke ukusa, kodwa ndafika umfazi walapho esoyika kangangokuba wandigxotha, esithi bekukho abantu abebeze kundikhangela, ngoko ndagoduka. Kwanabazali bam ekuqaleni baba mathidala ukundamkela, kodwa ke ekugqibeleni bandincathamisa kwigumbi lokugcina ingca, uMama wandithoba amanxeba. Noko ke emva kweentsuku ezimbini, babesoyika gqitha kangangokuba ndagqiba ekubeni ndibuyele kwasezintabeni.
NgoMeyi 5, 1945, ndothuswa yingxolo enkulu. Ndabona iinqwelo-moya zemikhosi eManyeneyo zibhabhela phantsi. Kanye ngelo xesha, ndaqonda ukuba uHitler ubhukuqiwe! Umoya kaYehova wandinceda ndanyamezela ubunzima obungathethekiyo. Ndazibonela ubunyaniso bamazwi eNdumiso 55:22 awayendithuthuzela ukususela kwasekuqaleni kwezilingo zam. Ndaye ‘ndalahlela umthwalo wam kuYehova,’ nangona ndandibuthathaka emzimbeni, wandilondoloza njengoko ndandihamba “kwintlambo yethunzi elimnyama.”—INdumiso 23:4.
Amandla KaYehova “Enziwa Agqibelele Kubuthathaka”
Emva kwemfazwe, ngokuthe ngcembe izinto zabuyela esiqhelweni. Ekuqaleni, ndasebenza kulaa fama yomhlobo wam isentabeni. Kodwa emva kokungenelela komkhosi waseUnited States ngoAprili 1946 ndakhululwa kweso sigwebo sokusebenza ubomi bam bonke efama.
Ekupheleni kwemfazwe, abazalwana baseBad Ischl nakwimimandla eyingqongileyo baqalisa ukuqhuba iintlanganiso rhoqo. Baqala phantsi ukushumayela. Ndafumana umsebenzi wokuba ngumantshingilane kumzi-mveliso othile, loo msebenzi wandenza ndakwazi ukuqhubeka ndinguvulindlela. Ekugqibeleni, ndaya kuhlala eSt. Wolfgang, ibe ngowe-1949, ndatshata noTheresia Kurz, owayefumene umntwana oyintombazana kumtshato wakhe wangaphambili. Sahlala kunye iminyaka engama-32, de umfazi wam othandekayo wahlaselwa sisifo seswekile waza wasweleka ngowe-1981. Ndamnyamekela iminyaka engaphezu kwesixhenxe.
Emva kokusweleka kukaTheresia, ndaphinda ndaba nguvulindlela, oko kwandinceda ndachacha. Ngoku ndikhonza njengovulindlela nomdala kwibandla laseBad Ischl. Ekubeni ndihamba ngesitulo esinamavili, ndihambisa uncwadi lweBhayibhile ndize ndithethe nabantu ngethemba loBukumkani kwipaki yaseBad Ischl okanye phambi komzi wam. Sendivuyiswa gqitha ziingxubusho zeBhayibhile.
Xa ndicinga ngezinto ezibuhlungu endiye ndazinyamezela azindenzi ndibe nengqumbo. Phofu ke, akho amaxesha endandidimazeka ngawo ngenxa yezo mvavanyo. Kodwa, ulwalamano lwam noYehova uThixo luye lwandinceda ndakwazi ukuziphosa ngasemva ezo ntlungu. Ndiye ndazibonela ubunyaniso besiluleko seNkosi kuPawulos esithi: “Amandla am enziwa agqibelele kubuthathaka.” Ngoku sendiza kufinca iminyaka eli-100 ubudala, ndivumelana ngamxhelomnye nompostile uPawulos xa esithi: “Ndiyakholiswa bubuthathaka, kukuthukwa, kukuswela, ziintshutshiso neenzima, ngenxa kaKristu. Kuba xa ndibuthathaka, kuxa kanye ndinamandla.”—2 Korinte 12:9, 10.
[Imifanekiso ekwiphepha 25]
Xa ndandibanjwe ngamaGestapo, ngoAprili 1939
Uxwebhu olunezimangalo zamaGestapo, ngoMeyi 1939
[Inkcazelo]
Both images: Privatarchiv; B. Rammerstorfer
[Umfanekiso okwiphepha 26]
Iintaba endandizimela kuzo
[Inkcazelo Ngomfanekiso okwiphepha 23]
Foto Hofer, Bad Ischl, Austria