Abantu Abaselula Bayabuza . . .

Ndinokuphila Njani Ngemvisiswano Nomntu Endihlala Naye?

“Ndandifuna ukuba ikhitshi lethu lihlale licocekile. Kodwa abantu endandihlala nabo yayingabakhathazi into yokubona izitya zithe saa ingabakhathazi nento yeembiza ezizele phezu kwesitovu. Babengayikhathalele nakancinane loo nto.”—uLynn.a

ABANTU ABAHLALA KUNYE. “Banokuba ngamaphuth’ ahlathi nye okanye babe yinyoka nesele,” utsho njalo umbhali uKevin Scoleri. Kusenokwenzeka ukuba wena akukayiboni loo nto, kodwa ngaphandle kwamathandabuzo ukuhlala nomnye umntu kunokuba lucelomngeni lokwenene.b Ngokutsho kweU.S.News & World Report, ukuxabana kwabantu abahlala kunye kubafundi baseyunivesithi kuxhaphake gqitha kangangokuba kwizikolo ezininzi kwenziwa “amatiletile” okubanceda, kuqhutywa iintlanganiso “neenkqubo zokuzinzisa ezo ngxabano.”

Ukuhlala nomnye umntu kunokuba nzima nakumaKristu aselula ashiye amakhaya ukuze aye kuba ngabavangeli bexesha elizeleyo. Okuvuyisayo kukuba, anokuzizinzisa iimbambano xa esebenzisa imigaqo yeBhayibhile ‘nobulumko bobuqili.’—IMizekeliso 2:7.

Mazi Kakuhle Umntu Ohlala Naye

Yakuphela imincili yokufuduka, usenokukhumbula ikhaya. (Numeri 11:4, 5) Noko ke, ukuhlala ucing’ emva, kuya kukwenza kube nzima ukuqhelana neemeko ezintsha. INtshumayeli 7:10 icebisa ngelithi: “Musa ukuthi: ‘Kutheni le nto imihla yangaphambili ibilunge ngakumbi kunale?’ kuba asibobulumko ukukubuza oku.” Ewe, kuhle ukuba wonwabe kuloo ndawo ukuyo.

Qala ngokuzama ukumazi kakuhle umntu ohlala naye. Liyinyaniso elokuba, akuyomfuneko ukuba abantu abahlala kunye babe ngabahlobo abasenyongweni. Enyanisweni, kusenokwenzeka ukuba loo mntu uhlala naye akutsalelekanga kuye. Sekunjalo, ukuba niza kuhlala kunye, ngaba akukho ngqiqweni ukuba nomeleze amaqhina obuhlobo kangangoko kunokwenzeka?

EyabaseFilipi 2:4 ikhuthaza ukuba sinyamekele, “kungekuphela nje izilangazelelo zobuqu, kodwa kwanezilangazelelo zabanye.” Nangona ungayi kumncina ngokungathi usematyaleni, ngaba akunakumbuza umntu ohlala naye ngentsapho yakowabo, ngezinto azithandayo, ngosukelo azibekele lona nangezinto anomdla kuzo? Emva koko mchazele nangawe. Njengoko nisiya nisazana, niya kuqondana ngakumbi.

Ngamathuba athile, ninokucwangcisa ukuba nenze izinto kunye. ULee uthi: “Maxa wambi siyazikhupha siye kutya ezivenkileni nomntu endihlala naye, okanye siye kwiindawo ezinezinto zobugcisa.” AmaKristu ahlala kunye, anokwenza izinto zokomoya kunye, njengokulungiselela iintlanganiso zebandla okanye ukushumayela, nto leyo enokuba luncedo gqitha ekuqiniseni ubuhlobo.

UDavid uthi: “Xa umntu endihlala naye eza kunikela intetho yesidlangalala esekelwe eBhayibhileni, ndandidla ngokutyelela ibandla akulo ukuze ndimkhuthaze.” Nangona yena nomntu ahlala naye bengathandi imidlalo okanye umculo ofanayo, ngenxa yokuthanda izinto zokomoya bangabahlobo. UDavid uthi: “Sisoloko sincokola ngezinto zokomoya. Enyanisweni, sichitha ixesha elide sithetha ngazo.”

Nantsi into omele uyilumkele: Musa ukuba ngunonca kumntu ohlala naye ude ungakwazi ukuzenzela abanye abahlobo. Ukuba uvakalelwa kukuba umntu ohlala naye ufanele aye nawe kuzo zonke iindawo omenywa kuzo, unokudikwa nguwe. IBhayibhile icebisa ukuba ‘niphangalale’ kubuhlobo benu.—2 Korinte 6:13.

Ukusebenzisa UMthetho Omkhulu

Noko ke, njengoko nisiya nisazana, niya kuqonda ukuba imikhwa yenu, nezinto enizithandayo zahlukile kwaye neembono zenu azifani. UMark oselula ulumkisa ngelithi: “Nifanele niqonde ukuba anifezekanga.” Ukungabikho bhetyebhetye okanye ukufuna ukuba izinto zenzeke ngendlela yakho kunokubangela ingxaki. Kufana nje nokulindela ukuba umntu ohlala naye enze iinguqulelo ezininzi ngenxa yakho.

UFernando uthi, xa uhlala nomnye umntu: “Kufuneka ungalindeli ukuba izinto zenzeke ngendlela othanda ngayo.” Amazwi akhe avisisana noMthetho Omkhulu odumileyo, othi: “Zonke izinto, ngoko, enifuna abantu bazenze kuni, yenzani ngokunjalo nani kubo.” (Mateyu 7:12) Ngokomzekelo, uFernando wakhawuleza wafumanisa ukuba babexabana nomntu ahlala naye kuba yena wayethanda ukuba indlu ifudumale, kodwa umntu ahlala naye wayefuna kuphole xa elele. Bayicombulula njani le ngxaki? UFernando uthi: “Ndazifunela ingubo.” Ewe, njengokutsho kukaMark, “yiba bhetyebhetye. Akukho mfuneko yokuba uncame yonke into oyithandayo, kodwa kusenokufuneka uncame nje izinto ezimbalwa.”

Nantsi enye inkalo onokusebenzisa uMthetho Omkhulu kuyo: Zama ukuzamkela izinto ezithandwa ngumntu ohlala naye. Ngaba akuluthandi uhlobo lomculo awuphulaphulayo? Kaloku, kusenokwenzeka ukuba naye akawuthandi umculo owuphulaphulayo. Ngoko, ukuba umculo othandwa ngumntu ohlala naye awukhuthazi ukuziphatha okubi, unokusuka uwamkele. UFernando uthi: “Bekuya kuba bhetele ukuba umntu endihlala naye ebethanda olunye uhlobo lomculo. Kodwa ndiya ndiwuqhela noko ngoku.” Kwelinye icala, unokuziphulaphulela umculo ngeeheadphones ukuze ungaphazamisi umntu ohlala naye, ekusenokwenzeka ukuba uyafundisisa.

Kwakhona, ukusebenzisa uMthetho Omkhulu kunokuthintela iingxwabangxwaba ezingeyomfuneko eziphathelele izinto eziphathekayo. Ngokomzekelo, umkhwa wokutya nantoni na esefrijini—ube wena ungayazi ukuba iyathengwa—unokubangela iingxaki. Kwangaxeshanye, ukuba lugcalagcala ngumsindo okanye ukumjamela umntu ohlala naye xa esitya izinto ezithengwa nguwe kunokuba yenye ingxaki. IBhayibhile isikhuthaza ukuba ‘singagogotyi lutho, sikulungele ukwabelana.’ (1 Timoti 6:18) Musa ukuthula, uvakalelwa kukuba uyaxhatshazwa. Zichaze ngobubele nangendlela ezolileyo izinto ezikukhathazayo.

Zihlonele izinto zomntu ohlala naye. Kukuzingca ukusuka usebenzise into yomnye umntu ungayicelanga. (IMizekeliso 11:2) Kwakhona, yicinge into yokuba umntu ohlala naye uyakufuna ukukhe abe yedwa. Bonisa ukuba uchubekile ngokunkqonkqoza ngaphambi kokuba ungene egumbini lakhe. Xa umhlonela, naye uya kwenjenjalo. UDavid uthi: “Akukho ngxaki xa sifuna ukufundisisa egumbini. Sobabini sibonisa intlonelo ngokuthi cwaka xa sifunda. Kodwa maxa wambi ndifundela kumzi wogcino-zincwadi xa umntu endihlala naye enenye into afuna ukuyenza.”

Ukusebenzisa uMthetho Omkhulu kuquka ukuhlawula inxalenye yeendleko zokuhlala kwangethuba okanye ukwenza esakho isabelo semisetyenzana yendlu.

Ukuzinzisa Iimbambano

Phambili phayaa kumaxesha okubhalwa kweBhayibhile, amadoda amabini angamaKristu ahloniphekileyo, uPawulos noBharnabhas akha ‘adubuleka kabukhali ngumsindo.’ (IZenzo 15:39) Kuthekani ukuba nani niba nengxaki efanayo? Kusenokwenzeka ukuba nixabana ngenxa yokungafani kobuntu benu okanye umntu ohlala naye unomkhwa ocaphukisayo okwenza uphelelwe ngumonde. Ngaba ukungavisisani ngezinto ezimbalwa okanye ukuxambulisana kuthetha ukuba nimele nahlukane? Akunjalo. Kuyabonakala ukuba uPawulos noBharnabhas bakuzinzisa ukungavisisani ababenako. Mhlawumbi nani ninokwenza okufanayo ngaphambi kokuba nithabathe inyathelo eliqatha njengokwahlukana. Nantsi eminye imigaqo yeBhayibhile enokuninceda.

● “Ningenzi nanye into ngokusukuzana okanye ngokuzigwagwisa, kodwa ngokuthobeka kwengqondo, nibagqala abanye njengabongamileyo kunani.”—Filipi 2:3.

● “Mabususwe kuni bonke ubukrakra bolunya nomsindo nengqumbo nokumemeza nokutshabhisa nabo bonke ububi. Kodwa yibani nobubele omnye komnye, nibe nemfesane, nixolelane ngesisa kanye njengokuba noThixo wanixolelayo ngesisa ngaye uKristu.”—Efese 4:31, 32.

● “Ukuba, ngoko, uzisa isipho sakho esibingelelweni, uthi ulapho ukhumbule ukuba umzalwana wakho unento ngakuwe, sishiye isipho sakho apho phambi kwesibingelelo, uze uhambe uye kuxolelana nomzalwana wakho kuqala, wandule ke, wakubuya, unikele isipho sakho.”—Mateyu 5:23, 24; Efese 4:26.

Iingenelo

AmaKristu amaninzi aselula (nangelula kangako) ahlala nabanye abantu aye azibonela ngokwawo ukuba yinyaniso kwamazwi kaKumkani osisilumko, uSolomon athi: “Ababini balunge ngakumbi kunomnye.” (INtshumayeli 4:9) Enyanisweni, abaninzi bafumanise ukuba ukuhlala nomnye umntu kuneengenelo. UMark uthi: “Ndiye ndafunda indlela yokuqhubana kakuhle nabantu nokuqhelana neemeko ezintsha.” URenee waleka ngelithi: “Ufumana ithuba lokuzazi kakuhle. Yaye kwangaxeshanye, umntu ohlala naye unokuba nempembelelo entle kuwe.” Kanti uLynn uthi: “Ukuqala kwam ukuhlala nabanye abantu ndandizicingela gqitha. Kodwa ndifunde ukuba bhetyebhetye. Ngoku ndiyaqonda ukuba akubikho nto iphosakeleyo ngomntu, kuba nje esenza izinto ngokwahlukileyo kum.”

Liyinyaniso elokuba kufuneka umgudu nokuzincama, ukuze ukwazi ukuphila ngemvisiswano nomntu ohlala naye. Kodwa, ukuba uzama kangangoko ukusebenzisa imigaqo yeBhayibhile, unokuhlala ngoxolo nabantu; usenokude ukunandiphe ukuhlala nomnye umntu.

[Imibhalo esemazantsi]

[Umfanekiso okwiphepha 17]

Ukuthabatha izinto ezingezozakho kunokudala ingxabano

[Umfanekiso okwiphepha 18]

Cingelanani