Ukugwema Ukubuya Kwemikhuba Emibi

“NGINQOBILE! Ekugcineni Impi Isiphelile!”

Lawomazwi azwakalisa umuzwa wokunqoba ozwiwa umuntu oye walwisana nomkhuba ongathandeki futhi oseye wawunqoba.

Kanti, yeka ukuthi ukubuyela kulowomkhuba kungamcasula kanjani lowomuntu! Yeka ukuthi kudumaza kanjani ukuthola ukuthi umkhuba omubi, obekwethenjwa ukuthi usuhambe unomphela, usubuye ngamandla amakhulu namangalisayo!

Mhlawumbe uke waba nokuhlangenwe nakho okufanayo kokubuyela emkhubeni omubi obufuna kabi ukuwunqoba. Uma kunjalo, ungase uqale ukungabaza ikhono lakho lokuwushiya unomphela umkhuba ongathandeki. Futhi imikhuba engathandeki ingase ibe miningi: Ukuba yisidlakudla, “ukuba umlutha” wamaswidi, ukuphuza ngokweqile, ukuthenga ngokuthatheka, ukushiywa yisikhathi njalo, ukugembula, ukubhema, nenqwaba yeminye imikhuba.

“Kungani Ngibuyele Emuva Lapho Okubi Kakhulu Sekwedlulile?”

Kungase kubonakale sengathi uma nje usudlule amazinga okuqala okuyeka umkhuba omubi, ukuwugwema kuyoba lula. Nokho, ukuhlola okuningi kubonisa ukuthi lokhu akuvamile ukuba njalo.

Encwadini ethi Selfwatching, abalobi uR. Hodg-​son noP. Miller bayachaza: “Ukubuyela emkhubeni kuvame ukwenzeka kakhulu ezinyangeni ezintathu zokuqala ngemva kokwelashwa. Eqinisweni, okunye ukuhlola kubonisa ukuthi cishe amaphesenti angu-66 ababhemayo, imihuqa yotshwala nemilutha yezidakamizwa abuyela emkhubeni wawo omdala phakathi nezinsuku ezingu-90 zokunquma kwawo kokuqala ukushintsha. Nokho, labo abakwaziyo ukulawula ukulutheka kwabo phakathi nezinyanga zokuqala ezintathu kuya kweziyisithupha banethuba elihle kakhulu lokuhlala bekwazi ukukulawula.”

Kungani ukubuya ngokuphindaphindiwe kwemikhuba emibi kuwusongo izinyanga​—⁠noma ngezinye izikhathi iminyaka​—⁠ngemva kwenkathi yokuqala yokuyiyeka? Esinye isizathu singukuthi ukucindezeleka okuthile ekuphileni kungabuye kuvele, futhi imikhuba emibi yayiyimithombo yokukhululeka kwesikhashana ezikhathini ezedlule. Ngakho ngisho nangemva kokuba unomuzwa wokuthi uye wawunqoba umkhuba ongathandeki, uma uba ngaphansi kokucindezeleka​—⁠njengalokho okubangelwa ukuswela imali, izinkinga ezingokwempilo, nokudumazeka okunhlobonhlobo​—⁠qaphela isilingo sokubuyela! Uma unesithukuthezi noma unesizungu, ungamangali uma umkhuba wakho wakuqala uzama ukubuya.

Ezinye izimbangela zokubuyela emkhubeni zingaba ukucindezeleka okungokwenhlalo, ukuhilizisana nabantu, imizwelo ephambene, nokuba sezimweni lapho isilingo sinamandla khona.

Ukuvimbela Ukubuyela Emkhubeni Omdala

Ngisho nangemva kwenkathi yokuqala yokulwa ngokunempumelelo nomkhuba ongafuneki, kuyadingeka ukuba uhlale usebenzisa amasu akusiza ukuba uyeke lowomkhuba kwasekuqaleni. Lamasu angasetshenziswa ngokuqhubekayo, noma kwezinye izimo kungaba okwanele ukuwavuselela njalo ngezikhathi ezithile, njengasezikhathini zokucindezeleka noma isilingo esinamandla.

Ngokwesibonelo, kungenzeka ukuthi uye wagcina amarekhodi abhaliwe okulandelela intuthuko yakho, njengalapho ubhala nsuku zonke noma masonto onke isisindo sakho njengoba uzama ukwehlisa isisindo somzimba wakho. Lokhu kuwusizo ekuyekeni umkhuba futhi akumelwe kuyekwe ngisho nalapho ukholelwa ukuthi ingozi isidlulile.

Kungenzeka futhi wawunezindlela zokuziklomela noma nini lapho ukwazile ukumelana ngokuphumelelayo nomkhuba owawuzama ukuwuyeka. Isimiso esilungisiwe sokuziklomela singaba usizo ekuvimbeleni ukubuyela emkhubeni. Noma, lapho uyeka umkhuba, ingabe walufaka ohlwini usizo lomngane? Mvumele ukuba akusize ugqashule emkhubeni wakho omubi wesikhathi esedlule.

Imaphi amanye amasu ayokusiza ugweme ukubuyela emuva, ikakhulukazi phakathi nezinkathi zokucindezeleka?

Lwisana Nayo Ngokwenza Okuthile

UDkt. R. Stuart, umqondisi wezengqondo weWeight Watchers International, Inc., utusa okulandelayo kulabo abalwela ukwehlisa isisindo: “Gcina ingqondo yakho imatasa ngezinhlobonhlobo zemisebenzi edinga ukugxiliswa kwengqondo. Imisebenzi yezandla kanye nezinto zokuzilibazisa kuphumelela kahle ekwenzeni lokho. Uma kungenzeka, yiba nezinto eduze kanye nendawo yokusebenzela esilungisiwe, ukuze ukwazi ukugxumela emsebenzini uma kudingekile.” Mhlawumbe isu elinjalo lingakusiza.

Yebo, endaweni yomkhuba omubi owawunawo faka umsebenzi onempilo. Khumbula, ngokunokwenzeka lomkhuba wawukunika isilinganiso esithile senkululeko lapho ukuphila kuba okucindezelayo, ngakho khetha ongase ukwenze esikhundleni sawo okuzoyifeza ngokuphumelelayo leyonjongo. Ungase ufunde, uvivinye umzimba, udlale imfijoli yomculo, udwebe imifanekiso, noma uvakashele abangane. Qala manje ngokubhala uhlu lwemisebenzi ongase uyenze esikhundleni somkhuba omubi. Bhala ngokugqamile leyo onquma ukuyilandelela. Yenza lemisebenzi emisha ngokuphindaphindiwe njengoba wawenza umkhuba wakho wakuqala. Lokhu kuzokwenza kube lula ukuphendukela kuyo lapho uzizwa ucindezelekile. Eqinisweni, lemisebenzi ongayenza iyoba imikhuba​—⁠imikhuba emihle!

Ukubaluleka Kokulwisana Nokudumazeka

Njengoba isilingo sokuphindela emikhubeni emibi singase sibe namandla ikakhulukazi lapho ungaphansi kokucindezeleka, ingabe ungalungisa ezinye zezimo ekuphileni kwakho ukuze unciphise ukucindezeleka? Ngisho nalapho izinkinga ezithile zingenakugwenywa, ungase ufunde ukulawula imizwelo yakho ukuze ungazizwa ugubuzelwe ukudumazeka.

Amandla okudumazeka avame ukuthathwa kancane. Isaga seBhayibheli sithi: “Umoya womuntu ungakwazi ukubhekana nobuhlungu bakhe [obungokomzimba]; kodwa umoya owaphukileyo, ubani ongabhekana nawo?” (IzAga 18:​14, NW) Yeka ukuthi kuyiqiniso kanjani! Ngokuvamile akuyona inkinga esenza buthaka kodwa ukudumazeka okubangelwa yiyo.

Esinye isaga seBhayibheli sikubeka ngalendlela: “Uma udangala ngosuku lukuhlupheka, amandla akho mancane.” (IzAga 24:​10) Imizwelo ephambene engalawuliwe iyokwenza buthaka. Iyokwenza ube yisisulu sokubuyela emkhubeni, mhlawumbe ikucindezele ukuba ubuyele emkhubeni omubi ukuze uthole ukukhululeka. Khona-ke yeka ukuthi kubaluleke kanjani ukulwisana nokudumazeka!

Kodwa kuthiwani uma naphezu kwemizamo yakho, uzithola uqala ukubuyela emuva?

Ukuhlehlela Emuva Okwesikhashana Ngokuphambene Nokuhlehlela Emuva Unomphela

Yeka ukuthi kulula kanjani ukucabanga: ‘Ngihlulekile, angivele ngiyeke.’ Lwisana nalowomuzwa. Yenqaba ukuvumela ukuhlehla kwesikhashana, noma ngisho okuningana, ukuba kusho ukwehluleka ngawe.

Cabangela lomfanekiso: Uma ubukhuphuka izitebhisi wawusushibilika ubuyela emuva ngesitebhisi esisodwa noma ezimbili ngenxa yokukhubeka, ubungathi, ‘Kuzomane kudingeke ukuba ngibuyele phansi ngiqale esitebhisini sokuqala’? Ngokuqinisekile ubungeke! Khona-ke, kungani, kumelwe usebenzise lokhu kucabanga okungeyikho ekulwisaneni nemikhuba emibi?

Imizwa yokuba necala ivame ukulandela ngemva kokwehluleka. Ungase wenze lemizwa ibe mibi kakhulu ngokuphetha ngokuthi awulungile, ngokuthi ungumuntu obuthaka futhi awufanelwe yilutho oluhle. Ungazivumeli ukuba ube necala elenziwe ihaba kanjalo. Likumunca amandla owadingayo ukuze uqale impi kabusha. Futhi khumbula lokhu: Umuntu omkhulu kunabo bonke owake wanyathela kulomhlaba, uJesu Kristu, wafikela ukuzokhulula izoni, hhayi abantu abaphelele. Ngakho kulesikhathi akekho kithi oyokwenza izinto ngendlela ephelele.

Elinye iphuzu lokucatshangelwa elokuthi icala lingase libonakale liyindlela ekahle yokuphunyuka esivumela ukuba sibuye senze leyonto futhi. Encwadini yabo ethi You Can’t Afford the Luxury of a Negative Thought, uP. McWilliams noJ. Roger bachaza lomphumela ongaba khona: “Icala . . . asikwenze futhi. Lapho ‘sesiyikhokhile inhlawulo yecala’ lethu, sikhululekile ukuba silenze futhi uma nje sizimisele ukukhokha inhlawulo. Iyini inhlawulo? Ingelinye icala.”

Akumelwe uvumele ukwehluleka kwesikhashana ukuba kube inqwaba yokubuyela emkhubeni. Hlala ukhumbula ukuthi, ekugcineni, ukunqoba umkhuba yikona okubalulekile, hhayi ukuthi wabuyela emuva yini ngesikhathi usemkhankasweni wokukunqoba.

Ngokuphathelene nalokhu kuwukuhlakanipha ukunquma kusengaphambili isu ozolisebenzisa uma kungenzeka uzithole usubuyela emuva emkhubeni wakho omdala. Isu lokukusekela elinjalo liyokuhlomisela ukulwisana nokubuyela emuva kungakephuzi.

Kungenzeka​—⁠Futhi Kufanele!

Khona-ke, impi yokulwisana nomkhuba omubi, idlulela ngalé kokukhuthazelela inkathi yokuqala yokuyeka okubuhlungu. Ihilela ukudlula ekudumazekeni ngaphandle kokubuyela emkhubeni omubi unomphela.

Ingabe kunzima? Yebo, kodwa kungenzeka ngokuphelele. Isu elakusiza ukuba uyeke umkhuba omubi ekuqaleni, uma uqhubeka nalo, liyokusiza ukuba ugweme noma unqobe ukubuyela emkhubeni. Iyini inzuzo enkulu yalokhu? Ukuzihlonipha​—⁠kuwumklomelo ofanelekile kukodwa. Futhi ngokunokwenzeka uyohlonishwa kakhulu nayilabo abakwaziyo.

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Ukushibilika ubuyele emuva ngezitebhisi ezimbalwa akudingi ukuba ubuye uqale ekuqaleni

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Usongo lokubuya komkhuba luncishiswa ngokuhlala umatasa ngemisebenzi edinga ukugxiliswa kwengqondo