Ukuqinela Abanye—Yinkinga Yembulunga Yonke

“Ulinge nje uze esikoleni kusasa, sizokubulala.”—Umfundi waseCanada okuthiwa uKristen wasongelwa ngocingo ngala mazwi yintombazane engazishongo ukuthi ingubani.a

“Angiyena umuntu otetemayo, kodwa isimo saba sibi kangangokuba ngangingasakuthandi ukuya esikoleni. Isisu sami sasiba buhlungu, futhi njalo ekuseni lapho ngiqeda ukudla ngangibuyisa.”—UHiromi, umfundi osemusha eJapane, ukhumbula indlela ayeqinelwa ngayo.

WAKE waphathwa kabi umuntu oqinela abanye? Iningi lethu lake laphathwa kabi esikhathini esithile. Kungenzeka ukuthi kwakusesikoleni, emsebenzini, noma kungenzeka ukuthi kwenzeka khona kanye ekhaya—lapho ukusetshenziswa kabi kwamandla kwenzeka khona ngezinga elethusayo kulezi zinsuku. Ngokwesibonelo, umthombo othile waseBrithani ulinganisela ukuthi abantu abadala abangamaphesenti angu-53 bahlukunyezwa ngamazwi abangane bomshado noma omasihlalisane babo. Abantu abaqinela abanye kanye nabantu abaqinelwayo bangase babe abantu babo bonke ubulili abavela kuzo zonke izizinda zokuphila nomaphi emhlabeni.

Empeleni kuyini ukuqinela abanye? Akufani ncamashi nokukhakhabisa umuntu noma ukumhlasela emzimbeni. Akubi yisenzakalo esisodwa noma ezimbalwa, kodwa kuvame ukuhlanganisa izenzakalo eziningi ezincane ezinqwabelanayo ngokuhamba kwesikhathi. Isazi sezokusebenza kwengqondo uDan Olweus, ingqalabutho ocwaningweni oluhlelwe kahle lokuqinela abanye, siphawula izici ezivamile zalo mkhuba, njengokuba nolaka ngamabomu nokungalingani ngamandla okuphawulekayo.

Mhlawumbe ayikho incazelo eyodwa engasetshenziselwa ukuchaza zonke izici zokuqinela abanye, kodwa kuye kwachazwa ngokuthi “isifiso sangamabomu sokuzwisa omunye umuntu ubuhlungu nokumenza acindezeleke.” Ukucindezeleka ngokomzwelo akudalwa yilokho okuye kwenzeke ngokoqobo kuphela, kudalwa nawukwesaba lokho okungase kwenzeke. Amasu asetshenziswayo angase ahlanganise ukugcona kabi, ukugxeka njalo, inhlamba, ukuhleba nokufuna izinto ezingenangqondo.—Bheka ibhokisi elisekhasini 12.

UKristen, osemusha okukhulunywe ngaye ekuqaleni, wayelokhu edunjwa yizingane eziqinela ezinye iminyaka eminingi esesesikoleni. Esikoleni sabaqalayo, izingane eziqinela ezinye zazinameka ushingamu ezinweleni zakhe, zimgcone ngokubukeka kwakhe, futhi zimsongele ngokuthi zizomshaya. Esikoleni esiphakeme, izinto zaba zimbi nakakhulu—kangangokuthi wathola izingcingo ezimsongela ngokuthi uzobulawa. Manje uneminyaka engu-18, uyabalisa: “Isikole yindawo okulindeleke ukuba uyofunda kuyo, hhayi ukuba uthole izinsongo zokubulawa noma ukhakhabiswe.”

Uchwepheshe othile wezempilo yengqondo uthi: “Kuyadabukisa kodwa kuwumkhuba ovamile ebudlelwaneni babantu. Abanye abantu bazizwa kangcono lapho belulaza othile.” Lapho lo mkhuba wokululaza abanye udlondlobala, ungaholela ekuziphindiseleleni ngobudlova ngisho nasenhlekeleleni. Ngokwesibonelo, isisebenzi esithile senkampani yezokuthutha esasinamalimi sagconwa futhi sahlukunyezwa kakhulu yizisebenzi eziqinela ezinye kangangokuthi sagcina sibulele ezine kuzo, sabe sesizidubula naso.

Umkhuba Wokuqinela Abanye Usembulungeni Yonke

Ukuqinelana kwezingane ezisesesikoleni kwenzeka emhlabeni wonke. Inhlolo-vo eyanyatheliswa yi-Pediatrics in Review yembula ukuthi eNorway, izingane ezingamaphesenti angu-14 ziqinela ezinye noma ziyaqinelwa. EJapane, izingane ezisafunda amabanga aphansi ezingamaphesenti angu-15 zibika ukuthi ziyaqinelwa, kuyilapho e-Australia naseSpain le nkinga itholakala kubafundi abangamaphesenti angu-17. EBrithani isazi esithile silinganisa ukuthi ziyizigidi ezingu-1,3 izingane ezihilelekile ekuqinelweni.

UProfesa u-Amos Rolider wase-Emek Yizre’el College wahlola izingane ezingu-2 972 ezikoleni ezingu-21. Ngokwephephandaba i-Jerusalem Post, lo profesa wathola ukuthi “izingane ezingamaphesenti angu-65 zazikhala ngokuthi zishaywa ngezimpama, zikhahlelwe, zisunduzwe noma zihlukunyezwe ezinye izingane.”

Umkhuba omusha kodwa owenziwa ngomshoshaphansi owokuthumela imiyalezo ebhaliwe esongelayo ngomakhal’ ekhukhwini noma nge-computer. Intsha ivula nezingosi ze-Internet ezikhuluma kabi ngomuntu oyisisulu, zize zifake ngisho nezindaba zakhe zomuntu siqu. NgokukaDkt. Wendy Craig waseQueen’s University eCanada, lolu hlobo lokuqinela abanye “luyilimaza ngokwedlulele ingane eyisisulu.”

Emsebenzini

Ukuqinela abanye emsebenzini kungenye yezimbangela ezikhula ngokushesha zezikhalazo ezihilela ubudlova emsebenzini. Empeleni, kwamanye amazwe kubikwa ukuthi kwande ngaphezu kokubandlululwa ngokohlanga noma kokuhlukunyezwa ngokobulili. Minyaka yonke umuntu oyedwa ezisebenzini eziyisihlanu e-United States ubhekana nale nkinga emsebenzini.

EBrithani umbiko owakhishwa ngo-2000 yi-University of Manchester Institute of Science and Technology wathi izisebenzi ezingamaphesenti angu-47 kwezingu-5 300 zezinkampane ezingu-70, zabika ukuthi zaziye zahlangabezana nezenzakalo zokuqinelwa kule minyaka emihlanu edlule. Ngo-1996, inhlolo-vo yoMbimbi LweYurophu esekelwe ezingxoxweni ezingu-15 800 emazweni angamalungu alo angu-15 ibonisa ukuthi izisebenzi ezingamaphesenti angu-8—ezingaba yizigidi ezingu-12—ziye zabhekana nokwesatshiswa noma nokuqinelwa.

Kungakhathaliseki ukuthi kusemagcekeni esikole noma emsebenzini, konke ukuqinela kubonakala kunesici esifanayo—ukusebenzisa amandla ukuze ulimaze noma ululaze omunye. Kodwa-ke, kungani abantu abathile beqinela abanye? Iyini imiphumela? Futhi kungenziwani ngakho?

[Umbhalo waphansi]

[Ibhokisi ekhasini 12]

Izinhlobo Zabantu Abaqinela Abanye

◼ Abaqinela Abanye Ngezikhwepha: Kulula kakhulu ukubabona laba. Babhodla intukuthelo yabo ngokushaya, ngokusunduza noma ngokukhahlela umuntu abamdumbile—noma ngokucekela phansi impahla yalowo muntu.

◼ Abaqinela Abanye Ngamazwi: Basebenzisa amazwi ukuze bamzwise ubuhlungu noma bamlulaze umuntu abamdumbile, kungaba ngokumqamba amagama ayiziswana, ngenhlamba noma ngokugcona okubeleselayo, okunokhahlo.

◼ Abaqinelana Ngokubhidliza Ubuhlobo: Basakaza amahemuhemu amabi ngomuntu abamdumbile. Lo mkhuba usetshenziswa kakhulu ngabesifazane abaqinela abanye.

◼ Izisulu Eziziphindiselelayo: Laba bayizisulu zokuqinelwa abajika baqinele abanye nabo. Yebo, ukuba kwabo yizisulu zokuqinelwa akwenzi kuthetheleleke ukuziphatha kwabo; kumane nje kusiza ekuqondeni isizathu sako.

[Umthombo]

Source: Take Action Against Bullying, by Gesele Lajoie, Alyson McLellan, and Cindi Seddon