Umbono WeBhayibheli

Ukuthembeka Emshadweni​—Kusho Ukuthini Ngempela?

Abantu abaningi balindele ukuba abantu abashadile bathembeke omunye komunye uma kuziwa endabeni yobulili. Lo mbono ngokwethembeka emshadweni uvumelana neBhayibheli, elithi: “Umshado mawuhlonishwe yibo bonke, nombhede womshado ungangcoliswa.”—Hebheru 13:4.

INGABE ukugwema ukulala nabanye abantu kuwukuphela kwalokho okushiwo ukuthembeka emshadweni? Kuthiwani uma umuntu ekhanukela othile ongashadile naye? Ingabe ukujwayelana kakhulu nothile wobulili obuhlukile kuwuhlobo “lokungathembeki”?

Ingabe Imicabango Yobulili Ayinangozi?

IBhayibheli liveza ukuthi ubulili buyingxenye engokwemvelo nenhle yokuphila kwasemshadweni, umthombo wokujabulisana nokwanelisana. (IzAga 5:18, 19) Kodwa ochwepheshe abaningi banamuhla bakholelwa ukuthi kungokwemvelo, baze bathi kunempilo, ukuba umuntu oshadile acabange ngokulala nabanye abantu. Ingabe imicabango enjalo ayiyona ingozi uma nje umuntu engenzi lutho ukuze ayifeze?

Imicabango yobulili ivame ukugxila ekuzaneliseni komuntu. Ukuziphatha okunjalo kobugovu kungqubuzana neseluleko iBhayibheli elisinika abantu abashadile. Ngokuphathelene nobuhlobo bobulili iZwi likaNkulunkulu lithi: “Umfazi akalisebenzisi igunya phezu komzimba wakhe, kodwa ngumyeni wakhe olisebenzisayo; ngokufanayo, futhi, indoda ayilisebenzisi igunya phezu komzimba wayo, kodwa ngumkayo olisebenzisayo.” (1 Korinte 7:4) Ukulandela iseluleko seBhayibheli kuvimbela ukuba ubulili bungabi isenzo esishoshozelwa inkanuko nobugovu. Ngenxa yalokho, bobabili abashadile bathola injabulo ethe xaxa.—IzEnzo 20:35; Filipi 2:4.

Ukucabanga ngobulili ngaphandle komshado kuhilela ukubukeza engqondweni izenzo okungathi uma zenziwa zibangele ubuhlungu obukhulu ngokomzwelo koshade naye. Ingabe ukuba nemicabango yobulili kwandisa amathuba okuphinga? Impendulo elula inguyebo. IBhayibheli libonisa ukuthi kukhona ukuhlobana phakathi kwemicabango nezenzo: “Yilowo nalowo ulingwa ngokuhehwa nangokuhungwa yisifiso sakhe siqu. Khona-ke isifiso, lapho sesakhekile, sizala isono.”—Jakobe 1:14, 15.

UJesu wathi: “Wonke umuntu oqhubeka ebuka owesifazane aze amkhanuke, usephingile naye kakade enhliziyweni yakhe.” (Mathewu 5:28) Ngokwenqaba ukugxila emicabangweni yokuphinga, ‘uqapha inhliziyo yakho’ futhi uvikela umshado wakho.—IzAga 4:23.

Kungani Kufanele Uhlale Uthembekile Ngokomzwelo?

Ukuze umshado uphumelele kudingeka ‘ukuzinikela kuphela’ koshade naye. (IsiHlabelelo SeziHlabelelo 8:6; IzAga 5:15-18) Lokhu kusho ukuthini? Nakuba kungokwemvelo ukuba nabangane besilisa nabesifazane ongashadile nabo, owakwakho unelungelo lokuqala lokujabulela isikhathi sakho, ukunakwa namandla angokomzwelo. Noma ibuphi ubuhlobo obuthatha lokho okufanele owakwakho futhi kubunike othile buwuhlobo “lokungathembeki,” ngisho noma kungenasenzo sobulili esihilelekile.a

Bungakheka kanjani ubuhlobo obunjalo? Othile wobulili obuhlukile angase abonakale ekhanga noma enozwela kunowakwakho. Ukuchitha isikhathi nalowo muntu emsebenzini noma ebudlelwaneni obuthile kungaholela ekuxoxeni ngezindaba zomuntu siqu, kuhlanganise nezinkinga noma ukudumazeka kwakho ngowakwakho. Ungase uqale ukuthembela kuye ngokomzwelo. Ukuxoxa naye ngokuqondile, ngocingo, noma nge-Internet kungakwenza wembule izinto eziyimfihlo. Kuyafaneleka ukuba abangane bomshado balindele ukuthi izindaba ezithile ziyoxoxwa nabo kuphela nokuthi “imfihlo” yabo ngeke idalulwe.—IzAga 25:9.

Qaphela ukuba ungaphiki uthi ayikho imizwa yothando empeleni ibe ikhona! UJeremiya 17:9 uthi ‘inhliziyo iyakhohlisa.’ Uma ujwayelene kakhulu nothile wobulili obuhlukile, zibuze: ‘Ingabe ngiyabuthethelela noma ngibugcine buyimfihlo lobu buhlobo? Bengingakhululeka yini uma owakwami ebengezwa izingxoxo zethu? Bengiyozizwa kanjani uma owakwami ehlakulela ubungane obufanayo nothile?’—Mathewu 7:12.

Ubuhlobo obungafanelekile bungaholela ezinkingeni zomshado, ngoba ukusondelana ngokomzwelo kuvula indlela yokuba nigcine nihlanganyele ubulili. Njengoba uJesu axwayisa, “enhliziyweni kuvela . . . ukuphinga.” (Mathewu 15:19) Kodwa-ke, ngisho noma umuntu engeke agcine ephingile, kungaba nzima kakhulu ukulungisa umonakalo obangelwe ukungamethembi umuntu. Inkosikazi okuthiwa uKarenb yathi: “Lapho ngithola ukuthi uMark wayeba nezingxoxo zocingo eziyimfihlo nomunye wesifazane kaningana ngosuku, lokho kwangephula inhliziyo. Kunzima kakhulu ukukholelwa ukuthi babengahileleki ebuhlotsheni bobulili. Angiqiniseki ukuthi ngiyoke ngiphinde ngimethembe yini.”

Gcina ubungane nabantu bobulili obuhlukile busendaweni efanele. Ungayizibi imizwa engafanele noma uthethelele izisusa ezingafanele. Uma unomuzwa wokuthi lobo buhlobo busongela umshado wakho, thatha isinyathelo ngokushesha sokubunciphisa noma ubuqede. IBhayibheli lithi: “Unokuqonda lowo oboné inhlekelele wabe esecasha.”—IzAga 22:3.

Vikela Isibopho Senu Sokuba Nyamanye

UMdali wethu wayehlose ukuba umshado ube ubuhlobo obuseduze kakhulu phakathi kwabantu ababili. Wathi indoda nomkayo kumelwe “babe nyamanye.” (Genesise 2:24) Lesi sibopho sokuba nyamanye sihilela okungaphezu nje kobuhlobo bobulili. Sihlanganisa nesibopho esiqinile ngokomzwelo, esiqiniswa ukungabi nobugovu, ukuthembana nokuhloniphana. (IzAga 31:11; Malaki 2:14, 15; Efesu 5:28, 33) Ukusebenzisa lezi zimiso kuyokusiza ukuba uvikele umshado wakho emonakalweni obangelwa ukungathembeki ngokomzwelo nasendleleni yokucabanga.

[Imibhalo yaphansi]

INGABE WAKE WAZIBUZA?

◼ Ingabe ukuba nemicabango yobulili kungaholela ezenzweni?—Jakobe 1:14, 15.

◼ Ingabe ukujwayelana kakhulu nomuntu wobulili obuhlukile kungasongela umshado wakho?—Jeremiya 17:9; Mathewu 15:19.

◼ Ungasiqinisa kanjani isibopho sakho somshado?—1 Korinte 7:4; 13:8; Efesu 5:28, 33.

[Amazwi acashunwe esihlokweni ekhasini 29]

“Wonke umuntu oqhubeka ebuka owesifazane aze amkhanuke, usephingile naye kakade enhliziyweni yakhe.”—Mathewu 5:28