Achichepere Akufunsa Kuti . . .

Kodi Bwenzi Langa Lapamtima Linasamukiranji?

‘UKUONEKA ngati watayikidwa bwenzi lako lapamtima.’ Anthu amanena choncho pamene wina aoneka ngati wachisoni. Koma pamene mwatayikidwadi bwenzi lanu lapamtima, mawuwo amakhaladi oona.

Ndiiko komwe, ubwenzi woona ndi kanthu kena kapadera ndi kamtengo wapatali. Baibulo limati: “Bwenzi limakonda nthaŵi zonse; ndipo limakhala mbale pooneka tsoka.”—Miyambo 17:17, NW. Mabwenzi abwino amatichezetsa ndi kutichirikiza. Amatithandiza kukula mwamalingaliro ndi mwauzimu. Pamene kuli kwakuti mabwenzi wamba kapena ongodziŵana nawo angakhale ochuluka, anthu amene ndithudi mungadalire ndi kuwauza zakukhosi kaŵirikaŵiri ngosoŵa.

Chotero ngati bwenzi lanu lapamtima lasamuka, mpomvekadi kuti mungakhwethemuke. Wachichepere wina wotchedwa Bryan akukumbukira mmene anamverera pamene bwenzi lake lapamtima linasamuka. “Ndinali wamantha, wosungulumwa, ndi wopwetekedwa mtima,” anatero. Kapena mumamva mofananamo.

Kuzilandira Zochitikazo

Kusinkhasinkha zifukwa zimene bwenzi lanu lasamukira kungathandize. Ndithudi, sichifukwa cha kusakondwa ndi ubwenzi wanuwo iyayi. Kusamuka kwakhala chochitika cha masiku onse m’moyo wamakono. Mu United States mokha, anthu oposa 36 miliyoni amasamuka chaka chilichonse! Malinga ndi bungwe la Bureau of Census ya mu United States, Mmereka wopezako bwino amasamuka maulendo 12 m’moyo wake.

Kodi bwanji kusamukasamuka chonchi? Zifukwazo zimasiyanasiyana. Mabanja ambiri amasamuka kotero kuti akapeze ntchito ndi nyumba zabwino. M’maiko osatukuka, nkhondo ndi umphaŵi zaumiriza mabanja mamiliyoni ambiri kusamuka. Ndipo pamene anyamata ndi atsikana akula, ambiri amasamuka kuti akakhale paokha. Ena amachoka kuti akakwatire kapena kukwatiwa. (Genesis 2:24) Komabe ena amasamuka kuti akalondole zinthu zauzimu. (Mateyu 19:29) Pakati pa Mboni za Yehova, ambiri amasiya malo amene anazoloŵera kuti akatumikire m’madera ena—kapena ngakhale m’maiko achilendo—kumene kukusoŵeka kwambiri atumiki achikristu. Ena amangosamukira m’dera lina m’dziko lawo lomwelo kuti akatumikire pa Beteli, dzina la malo oyang’anira ntchito ya Mboni za Yehova. Indedi, ngakhale kuti timawakonda kwambiri mabwenzi athu, tiyenera kuchiona monga mbali ya moyo kuti m’kupita kwa nthaŵi, angadzasamuke.

Chilichonse chimene chingakhale chifukwa cha kusamuka kwa bwenzi lanu, mungasoŵe kuti nanga mudzapirira bwanji kutayikidwa kwanuko. Koma pamene kuli kwakuti nkwachibadwa kusungulumwa pang’ono ndi kusautsika maganizo kwa kanthaŵi, mwinamwake mwaona kuti kungotambalala panyumba uli ndwii sikungawongolere zinthu mpang’ono pomwe. (Miyambo 18:1) Choncho tiyeni tione zina za zinthu zimene zingathandize.

Pitirizanibe Kulankhulana

“Zindikirani kuti ubwenzi wanu sunathe iyayi,” analangiza motero Bryan. Inde, kusamuka kwa bwenzi lanu lapamtima kudzasinthadi unansi wanu, koma zimenezo sizitanthauza kuti unansi wanuwo uyenera kutha. Phungu wa achinyamata, Dr. Rosemarie White anati: “Kutayikidwa nkovuta pausinkhu uliwonse m’moyo, koma njira yochita nako ndiyo kungokuona monga kusintha chabe, osati kutsekeka kwa khomo.”

Kodi mungachitenji kuti khomo laubwenzi likhalebe chitsegukire? Talingalirani nkhani ya m’Baibulo ya Davide ndi Jonatani. Mosasamala kanthu za kusiyana kwakukulu m’zaka zakubadwa, iwo anali mabwenzi a ponda apa mpondepo. Pamene mikhalidwe inamuumiriza Davide kuthaŵa kwawo, iwo sanalekane popanda kulankhulana. M’malo mwake, anatsimikizirana za ubwenzi wawo wolimba, mpaka kuchita pangano, kapena chivomerezano, kuti adzakhalebe mabwenzi.—1 Samueli 20:42.

Mofananamo, mungalankhulane ndi bwenzi lanu pamene likuchoka. Liuzeni bwenzi lanulo kuti ubwenziwo uli wamtengo wapatali kwa inu ndi kuti muli wofunitsitsa kupitiriza kumalankhulana naye. Patty ndi Melina, mabwenzi apamtima amene tsopano alekanitsidwa ndi makilomita 8000 a mtunda ndi nyanja, anachita zimenezo kumene. “Timalinganiza kupitiriza kumalankhulana,” anafotokoza choncho Patty. Komabe, kulinganiza koteroko kungalephereke, pokhapokha ngati mutachita makonzedwe otsimikizirika.—Yerekezerani ndi Amosi 3: 3.

Baibulo limatiuza kuti pamene mtumwi Yohane sanali wokhoza kuonana ndi bwenzi lake Gayo, analankhulana naye ‘mwa kumlembera ndi kapezi ndi peni.’ (3 Yohane 13) Inunso mungamvane kumatumizirana makalata kapena makhadi nthaŵi zonse, mwina kamodzi pa mlungu kapena kamodzi pa mwezi. Ndiponso ngati makolo anu alibe nazo kanthu za kulipirira mafoni akutali, mwina mungathe kumaimbirana nthaŵi ndi nthaŵi ndi kumauzana zochitika zatsopano m’moyo wanu. Kapena mungamvane kumatumizirana mawu ojambulidwa pa kaseti kapena pa tepi ya vidiyo. M’kupita kwa nthaŵi, mungalinganize kuchezerana kumapeto kwa mlungu kapena kupita limodzi kutchuti. Motero ubwenziwo ungapitirize kukula.

Kutseka Mpatawo

Ngakhale zili choncho, kuchoka kwa bwenzi lapamtima kudzasiya mpata m’moyo wanu. Monga chotulukapo chake, mudzapeza kuti mukukhala ndi nthaŵi yochuluka. Eya, musailole nthaŵiyo kuwonongeka. (Aefeso 5: 16) Igwiritsireni ntchito kuchita kanthu kena kaphindu—kaya mungaphunzire kuliza chiŵiya choimbira nyimbo, kuphunzira chinenero chatsopano, kapena kuchita chosangulutsa china. Kuchitira zinthu osoŵa ndi njira ina yogwiritsirira ntchito nthaŵi mwaphindu. Ngati muli mmodzi wa Mboni za Yehova, mungawonjezere gawo lanu m’ntchito ya kulalikira kwapoyera. (Mateyu 24:14) Kapena mungayambe projekiti ina yosangalatsa ya kuphunzira Baibulo.

Ndiponso, mtumwi Paulo analangiza Akristu a ku Korinto ‘kufutukuka’—ndiko kuti, kuphatikiza ena m’maubwenzi awo. (2 Akorinto 6: 13) Kapena mwakhala ndi bwenzi limodzi chabe kwa nthaŵi yaitali ndipo mwanyalanyaza anthu ena amene akanakhala mabwenzi. Achichepere pakati pa Mboni za Yehova amapeza kuti mipata kaŵirikaŵiri imapezeka m’mipingo yawo momwemo. Chotero yesani kufika ku misonkhano yampingo mofulumira ndi kutsalira kwa kanthaŵi pambuyo pake. Mutatero mudzakhala ndi nthaŵi yochuluka yoti nkudziŵa anthu. Misonkhano yaikulu yachikristu ndi kuchezera m’timagulu kumapereka mipata ina yopezera mabwenzi atsopano.

Komabe, liwu lochenjeza pano nlofunika: Musafulumire kwambiri kupeza mabwenzi atsopano kwakuti nkuyamba kuyanjana kwambiri ndi achichepere amene alibe makhalidwe ndi zonulirapo zauzimu zonga zanu. Oterowo angakuipitseni ndipo angakuvulazeni m’malo mokuthandizani. (Miyambo 13:20; 1 Akorinto 15:33) Yanjanani kokha ndi achichepere a maganizo auzimu amene ali ndi mbiri ya makhalidwe abwino.

Pamene mupeza wina wotero, kulitsani ubwenziwo mwa kulinganiza kuchita kanthu kena limodzi. Idyani chakudya pamodzi. Kachezeni ku myuziyamu. Kawongoleni miyendo. Linganizani kudzathera tsiku mu utumiki wachikristu limodzi, mukumafikira anthu ndi uthenga wabwino wa Ufumu wa Mulungu. M’kupita kwa nthaŵi ndi kuyesayesa, ubwenzi watsopanowo ungakule. Popeza kuti chikondi chachikristu chimakula—‘chimafutukuka’ kuti chiphatikizepo ena—pamene mupeza mabwenzi atsopano, simufunikira kumva kuti mukukhala wosaona mtima kwa bwenzi lanu limene linasamuka.

Mungatengenso mwaŵi woti muyandikire aja amene amakukondani kwambiri—makolo anu. Iwotu angathandize koposa, ngakhale kuti poyamba mungadzimve womangika pomafuna kucheza nawo. Wachichepere wina wotchedwa Josh anati: “Ndinali kumangodzikakamiza kuti ndicheze nawo, pakuti sindinali woyandikana kwambiri ndi mayi ndi atate wanga pa nthaŵi imeneyo. Koma tsopano ali mabwenzi anga apamtima!”

Kumbukiraninso kuti mudakali ndi bwenzi kumwamba. Monga momwe Dan wazaka 13 zakubadwa ananenera: “Kwenikwenidi suli wekha iyayi chifukwa udakali ndi Yehova.” Atate wathu wakumwamba nthaŵi zonse ngwopezeka kupyolera m’pemphero. Adzakuthandizani kulimbana ndi mkhalidwe wovuta umenewu ngati mumdalira.—Salmo 55:22.

Khalani ndi Kaonedwe Kabwino

Mfumu yanzeru Solomo anapereka uphungu uwu: “Usanene: Kodi bwanji masiku akale anapambana ano?” (Mlaliki 7:10) M’mawu ena, musangokhala m’zakumbuyo; ganizirani za lero ndi kutenga mwaŵi wake wonse. Bill, yemwe tsopano ali m’zaka zake za koyambirira kwa ma 20, anachita zomwezo kumene pamene anatayikidwa bwenzi lake lapamtima. Iye anakumbukira kuti: “Pambuyo pa kanthaŵi ndinayamba kupeza mabwenzi atsopano ndipo sindinasumike kwambiri maganizo pa zinthu zakale. Ndinayesa kukonzekera za mtsogolo ndi kukhala ndi moyo malinga ndi mkhalidwe umene unalipo.”

Malingaliro ameneŵa angathandize, komabe kusamuka kwa bwenzi lapamtima ndi chochitika chochititsa chisoni. Zingatengedi nthaŵi kuti muiŵale nthaŵi za chisangalalo zimene munali kukhala nazo limodzi. Tangokumbukirani kuti kusintha kwa zinthu ndi mbali ya moyo ndipo kungakupatseni mpata wa kukhwima ndi kukula. Pamene kuli kwakuti kungaoneke kukhala kosathekera kupeza mloŵa malo wa bwenzi lapadera, mungathe kukulitsa mikhalidwe imene ingakupangeni kukhala “wokondeka ponse paŵiri m’kaonedwe ka Yehova ndi ka anthu omwe.” (1 Samueli 2: 26, NW  ) Pamene muchita choncho, nthaŵi zonse mudzakhala ndi wina womutcha bwenzi lanu!

[Chithunzi patsamba 13]

Kutsazikana ndi bwenzi lanu lapamtima ndi chinthu chopweteka