Kutetezera Ana Athu ku Magulu Aupandu

“Ana amafuna anthu amene amawasamalira.”—Mwana Wanga Ayi—Mmene Makolo Angatetezere Magulu Aupandu.

KUTSATIRA pa unansi wathu ndi Mulungu, ana athu ali pakati pa chuma chathu chamtengo wapatali zedi. Tiyenera kulankhula nawo, kuwamvetsera, kuwakumbatira, ndi kutsimikizira kuti amadziŵa kuti ngofunikira kwambiri kwa ife. Tiyenera kuwaphunzitsa zinthu zabwino—kukhala oona mtima ndi othandiza, mmene angakhalire ndi moyo wabwino, ndi mmene angakhalire achifundo kwa ena.

Woyang’anira wina wamalo osungirako ana opalamula anatulukira kuti vuto lalikulu lerolino nlakuti: “Makhalidwe abwino sakuphunzitsidwa m’banja.” Ndithudi tiyenera kuchita zimenezi. Tiyenera kukhala ndi moyo umene tikufuna kuti ana athu akhale nawo ndi kuti aziona mmene zimenezi zimatipatsira ife chimwemwe. Ngati sitiwaphunzitsa makhalidwe abwino, kodi tingawayembekezere kuwatsatira bwanji?

Today, magazini ya aphunzitsi a ku America, inati kaŵirikaŵiri anthu aupandu amakopa achinyamata amene “amadziona kuti ndi olephera” ndi amene “akufunafuna chisungiko, unansi wathithithi, ndi kuyanjidwa ndi anthu.” Titawapatsadi zinthu zimenezo ana athu panyumba—chisungiko ndi kuwatsimikizira kuti akuchita bwino panyumbapo ndiponso pamoyo wawo—nzokayikitsa kuti angakopeke ndi malonjezo onama a gulu laupandu.

Mtsogoleri wa kagulu ka apolisi othana ndi ochita zaupandu ku California ananena za mmene makolo amadabwira pamene wapolisi afika pakhomo pawo ndi kuwauza kuti mwana wawo wagwa m’vuto. Sakhulupirira kuti mwana amene amaganiza kuti amamdziŵa bwino kwambiri angachite zinthu zoipa. Koma mwana wawo anasintha atapezana ndi mabwenzi atsopano. Makolowo anali chabe osadziŵa.

Nkofunika Kukhala Ochenjera

Anthu amene amakhala m’madera amene magulu aupandu ali okangalika kwambiri amati ana ndi akulu omwe ayenera kuchita zinthu bwino kuti kwa munthu waupandu asamaoneke ngati kuti angalimbane naye kapena kuti amadana ndi zochita zakezo. Pewani anthu ochita zaupandu pamene asonkhana m’magulu aakulu, ndipo musatengere kaonekedwe kawo kapena mmene amachitira zinthu, kuphatikizapo masokedwe ndi mtundu wa zovala zawo. Kuwatsanzira kungapangitse gulu lina laupandu lodana nawo kufuna kuthana nanu.

Ndiponso, ngati munthu avala kapena achita zinthu ngati kuti akufuna kukhala m’gulu laupandu, mamembala a gululo angamuumirize kuti aloŵe m’gululo. Atate wina wa ana atatu ku Chicago anasonyeza kufunika kwa kudziŵa malingaliro a mamembala a gulu laupandu la m’dera lanu. Anati: ‘Ngati ndivala kapusi yanga nditailozetsa kumanja, angaganize kuti sindikuwalemekeza.’ Zimenezotu zingachititse chiwawa!

Chitani Zinthu ndi Ana Anu

Mayi wina anati: “Tiyenera kudziŵa ana athu—mmene amamvera ndi zimene amachita. Sitingatero ngati ife tilibe chidwi ndi moyo wawo.” Winanso anati vuto la magulu aupandu silidzatha pokhapokha makolo atalithetsa. Anatinso: “Tiyeni tiwasonyeze chikondi. Ngati asokera, ifenso tasokera.”

Kodi timadziŵa mabwenzi a ana athu, kumene ana athu amapita atachoka kusukulu, nkumene amakhala madzulo kutada? Zoona, si mayi aliyense amene angakhale ali pakhomo pamene ana ake akubwera kusukulu. Koma amayi opanda amuna amene akuyesetsa mwamphamvu kulipira lendi ya nyumba ndi kudyetsa ana awo angathe kupempha amayi ena apafupi nawo kapena munthu wina amene amamkhulupirira kuti aziwaonerako ana awo masana.

Mwamuna wina amene amakhala m’dera lomwe muli magulu aupandu ochuluka anafunsidwa mmene angatetezerere ana ake. Anati akhoza kuzungulira naye mwana wakeyo m’deralo ndi kumsonyeza zotulukapo za zochita za magulu aupandu. Anakamuonetsa mawu awo odzichemerera ndi nyumba zogumuka ndi kumsonyeza “kuti malowa sakuoneka otetezereka ndipo ochita zaupandu amangokhala, sachita chilichonse chothandiza.” Anatinso: “Kenaka ndikanalongosola kuti kukhala mogwirizana ndi mapulinsipulo a Baibulo kukamtetezera kuti asakhale ngati iwo.”

Zinthu zapafupi ngati kukhala osangalatsidwadi ndi zochita za kusukulu za ana athu kungawatetezere. Ngati sukulu yawo imaitana makolo kuzochitika za pasukulupo kapena ngati makolo amaitanidwa kudzaona zochita za ana m’kalasi ndi kucheza ndi aphunzitsi, tsimikizirani kupitako. Dziŵani aphunzitsi a ana anu, ndi kuwasonyeza kuti muli osangalatsidwa ndi mwana wanu ndi maphunziro ake. Ngati sukuluyo siitana makolo, yesani kupeza nthaŵi nkukalankhula ndi aphunzitsi za mmene mwana wanu amachitira kusukulu ndi mmene inu mungathandizire.

Kafukufuku mumzinda wina waukulu ku America anasonyeza kuti mwa ophunzira amene kwawo ankawathandiza kapena kuwalimbikitsa kuchita homuweki, 9 peresenti analoŵa m’magulu aupandu. Koma m’mabanja amene zimenezo sizinkachitika, ophunzira oŵirikiza kaŵiri—18 peresenti—analoŵa magulu aupandu. Ngati banja lathu nlokondana ndi lomangiriridwa pamodzi ndipo ngati timachitira zinthu pamodzi, kudzakhala kovuta kuti ana athu akopeke ndi malonjezo abodza a anthu aupandu.

Zimene Ana Athu Amafunadi

Ana athu amafuna zinthu zimene ifenso timafuna—chikondi, chifundo, ndi kuyanjidwa. Ana ambiri sanadzimvepo kukhala okondedwa kapena kuuzidwapo kuti ngofunikira. Zisatero ndi ana athu! Tiyeni tiziwakumbatira, kuwauza kuti timawakonda, ndipo tione kuti ali ndi makhalidwe abwino amene tinawaphunzitsa. Ndi amtengo wapatali kwambiri kwa ife moti sitifunika kuwachitira zosiyana ndi zimenezo.

Gerald, yemwe anali m’gulu laupandu, anati: “Ndinalibe atate woti nkundithandiza, choncho ndinaloŵa gulu laupandu kuti ndipeze chosoŵa changacho.” Anayamba kugwiritsira ntchito mankhwala osokoneza bongo pausinkhu wa zaka 12. Koma pamene anali ndi zaka 17 amayi ake anayamba kuphunzira Baibulo nthaŵi zonse ndi Mboni za Yehova panyumba. Iwo anagwiritsira ntchito mapulinsipulo abwino a Baibulo m’moyo wawo. Iye anati: “Ndinawaona kusintha, ndipo ndinati, ‘Payenera kuti pali kenakake pamenepa.’” Chitsanzo chawo chabwino chinampangitsa kusintha moyo wake.

Ana athu ayenera kuona chitsanzo chabwino mwa ife—kuti timachita zimene timawauza kuti azichita. Azikhala ndi malingaliro abwino pabanja lawo, osati chifukwa cha zimene lili nazo, koma zimene limachita. Ndipo ana ayenera kuthandizidwa kuti azinyadira kuti ali ndi khalidwe labwino. Mkulu wakale wa zamilandu m’chigawo cha Los Angeles County, Ira Reiner, ananena motere: “Tiyenera kukhala ndi ana athu asanakakhale ndi magulu aupandu.”

Kuwapatsa Zimene Amafuna

Si katundu yemwe timawapatsa ana athu amene ali wofunika kwambiri. Zimene zimafunikadi ndi kuti tiwathandize kukhala anthu okonda ndi kusamalira ena amene ali ndi makhalidwe abwino. Baibulo limati munthu wolungamayo Yakobo ananena ana ake kuti “ana amene Mulungu anakomera mtima ku[ndi]patsa.” (Genesis 33:5) Ngati ana athu timawaona motero—monga mphatso imene Mulungu watipatsa—tidzakhala okonzekera bwino kuchita nawo mwachikondi ndi kuwaphunzitsa kukhala oona mtima, olungama ndi a makhalidwe abwino.

Motero tidzayesetsa kuchita zonse zimene tingathe kuti tizikhala ndi moyo umene udzakhala chitsanzo chabwino kwa ana athu. Tidzawapangitsa kunyadira banja lawo moyenerera ndi mopindulitsa, osati chifukwa cha chuma, koma mtundu wa anthu amene tili. Choncho kudzakhala kovuta kuti akafune kuthandizidwa ndi anthu a mumsewu.

Poona zimene ankachita ali mnyamata, gogo wina anati: “Sindikadachita chilichonse chimene chikanachititsa manyazi banja lathu.” Anavomereza kuti ankamva chonchi chifukwa ankazindikira kuti makolo ake anali kumkonda. Nzoona kuti amayi ndi atate amene makolo awo sanawasonyezepo chikondi zingawavute kusonyeza ana awo chikondi. Komabe, makolo amafunika kuyesetsa kuti aonetse ana awo chikondi.

Nchifukwa ninji izi nzofunika kwambiri? Monga mmene magazini ya “What’s Up,” yofalitsidwa ndi Utah Gang Investigators Association, inanenera, nchifukwa chakuti, “pamene achinyamata amamva kuti amakondedwa ndi kuti ngotetezereka—osati kutetezereka m’zachuma, koma mwa malingaliro—zosoŵa zawo zomwe zimawaloŵetsa m’gulu laupandu zimatha.”

Oŵerenga ena angati mabanja achikondi oterowo sakupezekanso. Koma alipo. Mungapeze ambiri m’mipingo ya Mboni za Yehova padziko lonse lapansi. Nzoona kuti mabanjawa si angwiro ayi, koma ali ndi ubwino waukulu: Amaphunzira zimene Baibulo limanena pa kulera ana ndipo amayesetsa kugwiritsira ntchito mapulinsipulo aumulungu a Baibulo m’miyoyo yawo. Komansotu, amaphunzitsa ana awo mapulinsipulo amenewa.

Mboni za Yehova zimagwirizana ndi zimene zinalembedwa mu The Journal of the American Medical Association kuti: “Munthu sangayembekezere kuti . . . achinyamata ‘Azingoti toto’ opanda kuwauza choti ‘Aziti inde.’” Mkunena kwina, ngati tikufuna kuti ana athu azilola zinthu zabwino ndi zolimbikitsa, tiyenera kuwatsogolera kuzimenezozo.

Palibe aliyense wa ife angafune kunena, ngati mmene ananenera tate wina, kuti: ‘M’gulu lake laupandu, mwana wanga anapeza mayanjano ndi ulemu zomwe sanakhale nazo nkale lonse.’ Sitingafunenso kumva ana athu akunena, ngati mmene ananenera mnyamata wina, kuti: “Ndinaloŵa gulu laupandu chifukwa ndinkafuna kukhala m’banja.”

Ife, makolofe, tiyenera kukhala banjalo. Ndipo tiyenera kuchita zilizonse zomwe tingathe kuti ana athu amtengo wapataliwo akhalebe okondedwa apabanjalo.

[Bokosi/Zithunzi patsamba 10]

Zimene Makolo Okhudzidwa Angadzipende Nazo

✔ Khalani panyumba ndi ana anu, ndipo chitani zinthu pamodzi monga banja

✔ Dziŵani mabwenzi a ana anu ndi mabanja awo, ndipo onani kumene ana anu amapita ndiponso ndi amene amapita nawo

✔ Ana anu azidziŵa kuti angakufikireni ndi vuto lina lililonse nthaŵi iliyonse

✔ Phunzitsani ana anu kulemekeza anthu ena, ufulu wawo, ndi malingaliro awo

✔ Thandizani ana anu mwa kudziŵana bwino ndi aphunzitsi awo, ndipo sonyezani aphunzitsi kuti mumawayamikira ndi kuchirikiza zoyesayesa zawo

✔ Musathetse mavuto mwa kukalipa kapena mwa chiwawa

Ana anu amafuna chikondi chanu

[Chithunzi patsamba 9]

Kukhala osangalatsidwa ndi ntchito ya mwana wanu kungakhale chitetezero