Thandizo Lenileni la Banja

“Ndi pomveka kunena kuti ku America kuli mavuto a banja. Sitinganene zosiyana ndi zimenezi pamene tiona kuchuluka kwa zisudzulo, ana a pathengo, [ndi] nkhani za kuvutitsa kwa ana ndi kuvutana m’banja.”

MAWU amenewa a wonenerera wa pawailesi yakanema wa ku United States Tom Brokaw angakhale oona m’mayiko ambiri. Kodi mavuto amenewa akutanthauzanji?

M’njira zambiri banja n’limene mokulira limaumba anthu. Ngati banja lili ndi mavuto, anthunso amakhala ndi mavuto. Ndiponso, banja n’limene limachirikiza ana mwamalingaliro ndiponso ndi ndalama. Ndimo mmene amakhala ndi maphunziro oyambirira ndi ofunika kwambiri pamoyo. Ngati banja lili ndi mavuto, kodi ana akuphunziranji? Kodi chitetezo chawo chili kuti? Kodi iwo adzakhala anthu a mtundu wanji?

Kodi m’nthaŵi ya mavuto ino banja lili ndi thandizo lililonse? Inde. Banja ndi makonzedwe oyambitsidwa ndi Mulungu iyemwini. (Genesis 1:27, 28) Ndipo m’Mawu ake, Baibulo, wapereka chitsogozo cha banja chofunika kwambiri. (Akolose 3:18-21) Zoonadi, sitingasinthe anthu onse, koma tingagwiritse ntchito uphungu wa Baibulo m’mabanja athu. Tikufuna kukufotokozerani za anthu ena amene anachitapo zimenezi ndi zabwino zimene anazipeza.

Kulepheretsa Chisudzulo

M’mayiko ambiri maukwati ngati 50 peresenti mwa maukwati onse amathera m’chisudzulo. Kumeneku ndi kulepheratu kwakukulu pa chikhalidwe cha anthu! Anthu ambiri amene amakhala kholo lokhalo losamalira ana pachifukwa chosudzulana, amagwiradi ntchito yaikulu polera ana awowo. Koma ambiri angavomereze kuti zimakhala bwino ngati okwatirana angathetse mavuto awo ndi kukhalabe limodzi.

Ukwati wa anthu ena ku Solomon Islands unali pafupi kusweka. Mwamuna, yemwe ndi mwana wa mfumu, anali wachiwawa komanso anali ndi mikhalidwe yoipa yambiri. Mkazi wake anali kuvutika kwambiri kwakuti anafuna kudzipha. Kenaka, mwamunayo anavomera kuphunzira Baibulo ndi Mboni za Yehova. Anaphunzira kuti aliyense amene amafuna kusangalatsa Mulungu sayenera kungodziŵa chimene chili cholakwa komanso kuti ayenera ‘kudana nacho choipa.’ (Salmo 97:10) Zimenezo zimaphatikizapo kudana ndi zinthu ngati kunama, kuba, chiwawa, ndi kuledzera. Iye anatsatira zimenezi ndipo mosapita nthaŵi anasiya makhalidwe ake oipa ndi moyo wake wachiwawa. Mkazi wake anadabwa ndi mmene anasinthira, ndipo ukwati wawo unasintha kwambiri, zonse chifukwa cha chisonkhezero cha Mawu a Mulungu.

Ku South Africa mkazi wina amene ndi wa Mboni za Yehova anamva kuti dona wake ndi mwamuna wa donayo anali kulingalira zosudzulana. Mboniyo inakamba ndi donayo za kaonedwe ka Mulungu ka ukwati ndipo inamsonyeza buku lakuti Chinsinsi cha Chimwemwe cha Banja. Bukuli, lofalitsidwa ndi Mboni za Yehova, limatchula malamulo a Baibulo onena za ukwati, likumagogomezera mmene Baibulo limathandizira okwatirana kuthetsa mavuto. Donayo ndi mwamuna wake anaŵerenga bukulo nayesa moona mtima kugwiritsa ntchito uphungu wa Baibulo umene limapereka. Zotsatira zake zinali zakuti iwo anaganiza za kusasudzulana​—ukwati winanso unapulumutsidwa mwa kugwiritsa ntchito malamulo a Baibulo.

Kusiyana Zipembedzo

Bwanji za banja limene okwatiranawo ali m’zipembedzo zosiyana? Moyenera Baibulo limalangiza Akristu kukwatira “mwa Ambuye.” (1 Akorinto 7:39) Komabe, nthaŵi zina mnzako wa muukwati angasinthe chipembedzo. Kodi banjalo siliyenera kutha zikatere? Ayi.

Ku Botswana, mkazi wina amene anali atangokhala kumene wa Mboni za Yehova anafunsidwa mmene chikhulupiriro chake chatsopano chinamsinthira. Anauza mwamuna wake kuti amuyankhire, ndipo mwamunayo anati: “Kuchokera pamene mkazi wanga anakhala wa Mboni za Yehova ndaona kuti akuchita zinthu zambiri zabwino. Tsopano iye ali ndi mzimu wa phee ndi wotsimikizira umene analibe kalelo. Anali ndi nyonga ndi chikhulupiriro choti asiye kusuta, vuto limene ine sindikuthabe kulisiya. Mkazi wanga tsopano akundisonyeza chikondi kwambiri ndiponso ana anga akuwakonda zedi, ngakhalenso anthu ena. Ndi wololera kwambiri, makamaka kwa ana. Ndimamuona ali mu utumiki wake, akuyesa kuthandiza ena kuwongolera miyoyo yawo. Ndaona kuti inenso ndayamba kuchita zinthu bwinopo. Ndikukhulupirira kuti zachitika chifukwa cha chitsanzo chake.” Malamulo a Baibulo abweretsa zabwino chotani nanga pabanja limeneli! Anthu ambiri amene saali Mboni akamba zofananazo ponena za anzawo a muukwati omwe ali Mboni.

Atate Atanyalanyaza Udindo Wawo

Unansi wa pakati pa atate ndi ana awo ndicho chomangira mabanja olimba. Mtumwi Paulo anapereka uphungu wakuti: “Atate inu, musakwiyitse ana anu; komatu muwalere iwo m’maleredwe ndi chilangizo cha Ambuye.” (Aefeso 6:4) Choncho n’zosadabwitsa kuti nkhani ina mu The Wilson Quarterly inati mavuto ochuluka a anthu ali chifukwa cha atate amene sakwaniritsa udindo wawo. Nkhaniyo inati: “Kuchokera mu 1960 kufika mu 1990, chiŵerengero cha ana amene sanali kukhala ndi atate awo owabala chinaposa kuŵirikiza kaŵiri . . . Kuwonjezereka komanyalanyaza udindo wawo monga atate ndicho chochititsa chachikulu cha mavuto ochuluka amene akukantha anthu a ku America.”

Kodi zimenezi zikutanthauza kuti ana amene atate awo sawatsogolera basi sangachite chilichonse? Ayi. Wamasalmo wakale anati: “Pakuti wandisiya atate wanga ndi amayi wanga, koma Yehova anditola.” (Salmo 27:10) Mnyamata wina wazaka zisanu ndi zinayi ku Thailand anaona kuti zimenezi ndi zoona. Amayi ake anamwalira iye ali wakhanda, ndipo atate ake chifukwa chosam’funa anam’siya ndi agogo ake. Chifukwa chomva kuti anthu sanali kum’funa ndi kum’konda, mnyamatayu anali kuvuta ndipo anatchuka ndi kumenya anzake. Anali kuopseza ngakhale agogo ake. Alaliki aŵiri anthaŵi zonse a Mboni za Yehova, ataona kuti kaŵirikaŵiri anali kuima kunja kwa Nyumba ya Ufumu yawo, tsiku lina anamuitanira kunyumba kwawo.

Anamuuza za Mulungu​—kuti Iye, monga atate, amakonda ana ake. Anamuuzanso za Paradaiso wa padziko lapansi amene Mulungu walonjeza anthu okhulupirika. (Chivumbulutso 21:3, 4) Izi zinamsangalatsa mnyamatayo, ndipo anali kubwera tsiku lililonse kudzaphunzira zowonjezeka. Mbonizo zinamuuza kuti ayenera kusiya ndewu ngati akufunadi kuti Mulungu akhale Atate wake. Izi zinali zogwirizana ndi mawu a Paulo kwa Aroma akuti: “Monga momwe mukhoza, khalani ndi mtendere ndi anthu onse.” (Aroma 12:18) Anayeneranso kumachitira chifundo agogo ake. (1 Timoteo 5:1, 2) Posapita nthaŵi anayamba kugwiritsa ntchito malamulo a Baibulo​—mosakayikira kakhalidwe kake ndi agogo ake kanawongokera kwambiri. (Agalatiya 5:22, 23) Anthu a pamudzipo anachita chidwi kwambiri ndi mmene anasinthira kotero kuti anafuna kuti ana awonso aziphunzira Baibulo ndi Mboni za Yehova!

Mzimu Wamtendere

Mtumwi Paulo analembera Akolose kuti: “Khalani nacho chikondano, ndicho chomangira cha mtima wamphumphu. Ndipo mtendere wa Kristu uchite ufumu m’mitima yanu.” (Akolose 3:14, 15) Mzimu wamtendere ndi chikondi chapansi pa mtima zingathedi kumanga banja pamodzi. Zingathetsenso zidani za pabanja zokhalapo kwanthaŵi yaitali. Rukia, amene amakhala ku Albania, sanalankhulane ndi mlongo wake kwa zaka zopitirira 17 chifukwa chosagwirizana pankhani inayake ya pabanja lawo. Pamene anaphunzira Baibulo ndi Mboni za Yehova, anaphunzira kuti mtumiki wa Mulungu aliyense amalimbikitsidwa kukhala mwa mtendere ndi ena. “Afunefune mtendere ndi kuulondola.”​—1 Petro 3:11.

Rukia anazindikira kuti anafunika kufunafuna mtendere ndi mlongo wake. Anapemphera usiku wonse, ndipo mmaŵa mwake, mtima wake ukugunda, anapita kunyumba ya mlongo wakeyo. Mwana wa mlongo wakeyo ndiye anatsegula chitseko ndipo modabwa anafunsa kuti: “Kodi mwadzatani kuno?” Mofatsa Rukia anati akufuna kuonana ndi mlongo wake kuti akambirane naye za mtendere. Chifukwa? Chifukwa chakuti tsopano anali atazindikira kuti ndicho chifuno cha Mulungu. Mlongo wakeyo anavomereza, ndipo panali kukupatirana ndi misozi yachikondwerero pa kuyanjananso kwawoko​—banja linayanjanitsidwa chifukwa chotsatira malamulo a Baibulo.

Mayanjano Oipa

“Lerolino, mwana amaonerera wailesi yakanema kwa maola asanu ndi aŵiri patsiku. Pomaliza sukulu ya pulayimale, amakhala ataonerera kuphana nthaŵi zoposa zikwi zisanu ndi zitatu ndi ziwawa zikwi zana limodzi.” Limatero buku lakuti The 7 Habits of Highly Effective Families. Kodi chimatsatira n’chiyani mwana akamaonera zinthu zoterozo? “Akatswiri” amanena zosiyanasiyana, koma Baibulo limachenjeza mwamphamvu za mayanjano oipa. Mwachitsanzo limati: “Mnzawo wa opusa adzaphwetekedwa.” (Miyambo 13:20) Limatinso: “Mayanjano oipa aipsa makhalidwe okoma.” (1 Akorinto 15:33) Moyo wabanja ungawongokere ngati mwanzeru tiona uphungu umenewu kukhala woona kaya tikuyanjana ndi anthu ena kapena ndi pologalamu ya pawailesi yakanema.

Mayi wina ku Luxembourg anali kuphunzira Baibulo ndi wa Mboni za Yehova. Tsiku lina anauza Mboniyo kuti ana ake akazi aŵiri, wina wazaka zisanu ndi ziŵiri ndi wina wazaka zisanu ndi zitatu, amakonda kukangana kwambiri madzulo ndipo amakhala achiwawa. Mboniyo inafunsa zimene atsikanawo amachita madzulo. Mayiyo anati amaonera wailesi yakanema pamene iye akukonza m’khichini. Mapologalamu otani? “Oo, zidude,” anayankha motero mayiyo. Mlendo wakeyo atanena kuti mapologalamu oterowo kaŵirikaŵiri amakhala achiwawa, mayi wa atsikanawo analonjeza kuti aziwayang’anira.

Tsiku lotsatira, mayiyo anati anachita mantha ndi zidude zimene ana ake anali kuonerera. Zinali zilombo zongoyerekezera zochokera mumlengalenga zimene mwaukali zinali kuwononga chilichonse chimene zapeza. Analongosolera ana akewo kuti Yehova amadana ndi chiwawa ndipo sasangalala ife tikamaonera nkhanza zoterozo. (Salmo 11:5) Atsikanawo, pofuna kusangalatsa Yehova, anavomera kuti azijambula ndi kumalocha zithunzi m’malo moonera kanema. Mwamsanga khalidwe lawo lachiwawa linasintha, ndipo moyo wabanjalo unawongokera.

Izi ndi zitsanzo zochepa chabe zosonyeza kuti kugwiritsa ntchito malamulo a Baibulo kumawongolera moyo wabanja. Uphungu wa Baibulo umagwira ntchito pamkhalidwe uliwonse. Ndi wodalirika ndipo mwamphamvu umasonkhezera kuchita zabwino. (Ahebri 4:12) Pamene anthu aphunzira Baibulo ndi kuyesa moona mtima kugwiritsa ntchito zimene limanena, mabanja amalimbitsidwa, anthu amawongolera umunthu wawo, ndipo zolakwa zimapewedwa. Ngakhale pamene munthu mmodzi yekha wa m’banjalo ndiye akutsatira uphungu wa Baibulo, zinthu zimayamba kuyenda bwino. Ndithudi, pambali iliyonse ya moyo, tiyenera kuona Mawu a Mulungu monga momwe anawaonera wamasalmo amene analemba kuti: “Mawu anu ndiwo nyali ya ku mapazi anga, ndi kuunika kwa panjira panga.”​—Salmo 119:105.

[Chithunzi patsamba 5]

Mavuto abanja athetsedwa mwa kugwiritsa ntchito malamulo a Baibulo