Ukuhlangabezana Nocelomngeni LweCFS
OOGQIRHA kwinkomfa yabo xa babexubusha ngokunyanga iCFS (isifo sokudinwa ngokungapheliyo) ebudeni bosasazo lukamabonwakude omnye wabo wathi: “Bonke aba baguli babonakala besempilweni njengomntu wonke okweli qela.” Ngenxa yokuba aba baguli bengakhangeleki begula, ngokufuthi baphathwa ngendlela ekwandisa ngakumbi ukubandezeleka kwabo.
UPatricia, ogula yiCFS waseTexas, wathi: “Maxa wambi ndandiye ndivakalelwe njengoYobhi, owayenamaqabane awayengasoloko eluncedo.” Ngokomzekelo, olunye undwendwe olwalumtyelele lwakhe lwamxelela oku: “Ubonakala uphilile kum! Bendicinga ukuba ugula ngokwenene. Wena ufana nqwa nomamazala wam. Naye uzixhalabisa gqitha ngokucinga ukuba uyagula.”
Amazwi alolo hlobo awakhi, yaye andisa ucelomngeni lweCFS. UBetty, ogula yiCFS waseUtah, wathi, “Intlungu engokwemvakalelo ngenxa yoko kugalelw’ amanzi ayithetheki, yaye yeyona ntlungu enkulu eziswa kukugula yiCFS.”
Kufuneka Ukuqonda Nothando
UBetty wachaza indlela ekusenokuba bonke abaguli abaneCFS bavakalelwa ngayo xa wathi: “Asifuni ukuba abantu babe novelwano ngathi. Asifuni kusizelwa. Kodwa, yhu, hayi indlela esikufuna ngayo ukuqondwa! UThixo uyabazi ubunzima nentlungu esikuyo, yaye oko kokona kubalulekileyo. Kodwa kukwabalulekile nokuba sifumane inkxaso ngokweemvakalelo kubazalwana noodade bethu abangamaKristu.”
Noko ke, ngokutsho komguli oselula weLizwana laseWashington, kubantu abaninzi kusenzima ukuyiqonda iCFS. Wathi, “Eyona nto ndinqwenela abantu babe nayo ngakumbi kukuqonda, kungekhona uvelwano, kodwa ukuqonda. Yaye oko akunakwenzeka ngenxa yokuba asingabo bonke abantu abakhe bajamelane nesigulo esinjengesi.”
Kanti, akunakuba yinto engenakwenzeka ukuqonda abaguli abaneCFS. Liyinyaniso elokuba, imeko yabo engokwasemzimbeni sisenokungayazi. Kodwa sinokufunda ngesigulo sabo side siqonde eyona yona ndlela bagula ngayo. Ngokungafaniyo noGawulayo, obulalayo, omnye umguli wachaza, iCFS “ikwenza unqwenele ukuba akwaba ubufile.” UDeborah, owaqala ukugula ngowe-1986, wazityand’ igila wathi: “Kangangethuba elide, bendithandaza busuku ngabunye kuThixo ukuba andivumele ndife.”—Thelekisa uYobhi 14:13.
Kambe ke, sifuna ukuba lukhuthazo, sincede aba baguli bahlangabezane nocelomngeni lweCFS, kodwa ngelishwa amazwi ethu asuke enze into ebesingayifuni. Ngokomzekelo, omnye umfo owayetyelele umguli oneCFS ngokunyaniseka wathi: “Kufuneka usele ubisi olushushu ebusuku. Luya kukunceda ulale, yaye kungentsuku zatywala uza kuphila.” Loo magqabaza ayetyhila ukungayazi tu iCFS. Ayamkhathaza umguli kunokuba amncede.
Ngokufuthi abantu abagulayo basenokuziva bemadolw’ anzima ukwenza izinto ezinjengokuya kwiintlanganiso zamaKristu. Xa bezile, umgudu obandakanyekileyo ungaphezu kokuba sisazi. Ngoko kunokuba sitsalele ingqalelo kukungabikho kwabo kwithuba elidluleyo, kuphela nje sinokuthi: “Ndiyakuvuyela ukukubona. Ndiyazi ukuba akusoloko kulula kuwe ukuba ukwazi ukuza, kodwa siyakuvuyela ukukubona ngobu busuku.”—Bona ibhokisi elapha.
Inkqubo yokusebenza kwemithambo-luvo yabaguli abaneCFS idla ngokuchaphazeleka, ide ibangele ukuba ukusebenzisana kakuhle nabantu kube nzima. UJennifer, onomyeni oneCFS wachaza oku, “Kufuneka sibe ngabakhuseli phakathi kwabo nabanye abantu. Simele sibancede ngokubanika ithuba lokuba bodwa, ngokungaze sibaphazamise nangokubanceda baphephe naluphi na uhlobo lwengxwabangxwaba.”
UJennifer wavuma ukuba isigulo saba baguli sinokuba luxanduva kumalungu entsapho, asenokukruquka kukubenzela yonke into. Kodwa njengokuba watshoyo, ukuba abaguli abavunyelwa ukuba baphumle, baya kuphila kade, yaye ngoko wonke ubani uya kulahlekelwa ekugqibeleni. Okuvuyisayo kukuba, kubonakala ukuba esi sigulo asifane sasulele ukuba siyasulela kwaukwasulela, nangona kubonakala ukuba kukho utyekelo olungokwemfuza lwesi sigulo.
UTottie, ogula yiCFS nomgumfazi womveleli ohambahambayo wamaNgqina kaYehova, wathi kangangeminyaka indoda yakhe iye yamnceda ukuba ahlangabezane nocelomngeni lwesi sigulo. Uyamazisa indlela amxabise ngayo kodwa uthi: “Ngokufuthi izihlobo zibuza ngam nangempilo-ntle yam, kodwa noKen uyakufuna ukukhuthazwa.”
Ukwazi Kwangaphambili—Kodwa Okuyingozi
ICFS ayifane ibulale ukuba iyabulala kwaukubulala. Ukukwazi oko kusenokukunceda uhlangabezane nocelomngeni lwayo. Imeko iyaguquka ize ibe incomeke kwinkoliso yabantu ekuhambeni kwexesha, yaye abaninzi baye baphila. UGqr. Anthony Komaroff wathi: “Akukho noba abe mnye umguli esakhe sambona kumakhulukhulu ebesiye sawahlolisisa owakhe wagula gqitha nowayesiya egula ngokungaginyisi mathe ekuhambeni kwexesha. Akukaze kubekho unjalo. Ngoko ngokungafaniyo nezinye izigulo ezikhula ngokungayekeleliyo, esi sigulo sahluke ngokupheleleyo.”
UGqr. Andrew Lloyd, ongumphandi ngeCFS obalaseleyo eOstreliya, eqinisekisa oku wathi: “Xa ubani echacha, yaye sikholelwa ukuba ngokuqhelekileyo oko kuyenzeka, uchacha ngokupheleleyo. . . . Ngoko ke, oko kubonisa ukuba enoba iyintoni le nkqubo ibangela le meko yokudinwa inokushenxiswa ngokupheleleyo.” Kuyabonakala ukuba, aba baguli abanaziva zokwenzakala kumalungu omzimba emva kokuba beye bachacha.
UDeborah, owayethandaza rhoqo ukuba afe ngenxa yokuba wayeziva egula, ekugqibeleni waphila. Uziva esengulaa mntu wayenguye ngaphambi kokuba agule yaye kutshanje uye wathi uceba ukuphinda athelele indoda yakhe kubulungiseleli bexesha elizeleyo. Abanye baye bachacha ngokufanayo. Kanti, kukho imfuneko yokulumka. Ngoba?
UKeith, owaye waphinda wagula, walumkisa wathi: “Kubaluleke kakhulu ukungayijongeli phantsi le ngxaki, ungangxami ngokucinga ukuba igqithile.” Xa wayeziva ephilile kwakhona, uKeith waphinda wangenela ubulungiseleli bexesha elizeleyo waza waqala phantsi uqheliselo lwakhe lokuba yimbaleki, ebaleka rhoqo yaye ephakamisa iintsimbi. Kodwa, okulusizi kukuba, eso sigulo sabuya waza waphinda walala ngandletyana nye!
Le yeyona meko iyingozi yesi sigulo; ukuphinda ugule kuyinto eqhelekileyo. Kanti, kunzima ukukuphepha. Kunjengokuba uElizabeth wachaza oku: “Kunzima ukungazami ukubuyisa elaa xesha belimke namanzi xa uziva uchacha. Ukufuna ngamehlw’ abomvu ukukulibala ukugula—ufuna ukwenza izinto.”
Ngenxa yeso sizathu kufuna umgudu nomonde ukuhlangabezana nocelomngeni lweCFS.
Oko Banokukwenza Abaguli
Kubalulekile ukuba abaguli bayamkele ezingqondweni zabo into yokuba banesigulo esinomkhondo ongenakuxelwa kwangaphambili. UBeverly, obegula kangangexesha elide, wachaza oku: “Ukuba ndiye ndaqalisa ukucinga ukuba ndiphilile ebudeni beeveki okanye iinyanga zam zesiqabu, ndidla ngokugula ndibuthwe phantsi kunakuqala. Ngoko ndisoloko ndisebenzela ukubamkela ubuthathaka endinabo.” UKeith wathi: “Ukuba nomonde kusenokuba ngoyena ndoqo.”
Abaguli abaneCFS kufuneka balondoloze amandla abo baze balinde ukuba baphile. Ngaloo ndlela, abo bahlangabezana ngokunempumelelo neCFS bagxininisa ukuxabiseka kwento ebizwa ngokuba lunyango lokuphumla ngokuzinyanzela. Oku kuthetha ukuzinyanzela ulungiselela into yexesha elizayo ngokufumana ukuphumla okungakumbi kwangaphambili. Ngenxa yoko, abaguli abaneCFS basenokukwazi ukuya kwiindibano zamaKristu okanye kwezinye izinto ezikhethekileyo bangaguli gqitha emva koko ngenxa yomsebenzi onzima abawenzileyo.
Kwakhona, kubalulekile ukusoloko uzolile, unomoya wobulali, ekubeni ukuxinezeleka ngokwasengqondweni nangokwemvakalelo kusenokubangela ukuba uphinde ugule kanye njengokuba bekuya kuba njalo ngokusebenza nzima gqitha ngokwasemzimbeni. Ngoko nali icebiso elilungileyo: “Musa ukuchitha ixesha uzikhusela.” Ewe, kuphephe ukube uzama ukucacisa imeko yakho kwabo bathandabuzayo nabangayiqondiyo.
Ukuba ugula yiCFS, ufanele ukhumbule ukuba into ebalulekileyo asikoko abantu basenokukucinga ngawe kodwa koko uMdali wethu, uYehova uThixo, akucingayo. Yaye uyayixabisa imeko yakho yaye ukuthanda ngokwenene ngenxa yayo nayiphi na into oyenzayo ekumkhonzeni. Unokuba nentembelo kwelokuba uYehova nezithunywa zezulu bondele, kungekhona koko ukuvelisayo, kodwa, kwisimo sakho sengqondo, unyamezelo nokuthembeka njengakuYobhi.
USusan, obelele ngandletyana-nye ngenxa yeCFS iminyaka emibini yonke, wathi enye yezona zinto zibuhlungu ngeCFS kukuba umntu unokude avakalelwe lelokuba ubomi abunanjongo. Ngoko naku akuncomelayo: “Fumana izinto ezinokukuzisela uvuyo okanye ulwaneliseko. Ndineentyatyambo ezintathu zeAfrican violet, yaye ndisoloko ndizibukela yonke imihla xa zidubula ngokutsha.” Uhlabela mgama athi, kodwa eyona nto ibaluleke kakhulu “kukwayama ngoYehova ngokuthandaza nangokubeka imeko yakho yokomoya kwindawo yokuqala.”
Abaguli abaninzi bathi bakufumanisa kuluncedo ukuphulaphula iikhasethi ezirekhodiweyo zeBhayibhile nezephephancwadi IMboniselo noVukani! Okuphawulekayo kukuba, uPriscilla, okhankanywe kwinqaku lesibini, wathi nje ukuba umntu afikelele kwinqanaba lokuyeka ukuba ecingana noko aye waphulukana nako, “iCFS ayiphinde ingakonwabisi.” Wathi: “Ukuzinceda ndingacingi ngokuba le meko iya kubakho ngonaphakade, jikelele egumbini lam ndibeke izibhalo ezikhuthazayo kwindawo ezibonakalayo.”
Kuthekani Ngonyango?
Okwangoku kuncinane kakhulu okunokwenziwa ngokwezamayeza ukunyanga iimpawu zesi sifo. Bekukhe kwathenjelwa kwisiyobisi ebesikhe salingwa esiyiAmpligen. Kubonakele ngathi imeko iya incomeka kwabaninzi abasebenzise esi siyobisi, kodwa imiphumo ebingalindelwanga eyafunyanwa ngabathile yabangela ukuba iSebe Lolawulo Lokutya Neziyobisi laseUnited States lithi xha ukuyisebenzisa ngakumbi.
Ukulal’ uphaphama, kuquka ukuphuthelwa, ezo zinto zixhaphakile kubantu abaneCFS. Okubangel’ umdla kukuba, amayeza okunceda udandatheko—maxa wambi ithamo lekhulu eliselelwa ukunceda udandatheko—ayabanceda abaguli abathile, kungekhona bonke, bakwazi ukulala yaye ngaloo ndlela imeko yabo incomeke. Kangangeminyaka uBeverly wayengazifuni ezo ziyobisi kodwa ke wazama esinye. Wathi, “Ndancedakala ngokungummangaliso, akwaba ndandiqalise kuselithuba.”
IThe Female Patient yathi, “Zininzi nezinye iindlela [kuquka nonyango “olwahlukileyo” abaguli abathile abalufumanisa lunomtsalane xa lusilela olo luqhelekileyo] eziye zasetyenziswa ukunyanga iCFS. Phakathi kwezinye, ezi ndlela ziquka intaphane yamayeza, unyango olungokwasemzimbeni, . . . iacupuncture, ihomeopathy, inaturopathy, unyango lweanticandidal neayurvedism, phakathi kwezinye.”
Lo lindixesha wezamayeza wachaza oku: “Zingakhathaliseki iinkolelo zakhe zobuqu, ugqirha ufanele abe nolwazi ngezi zinto [ngolu nyango] ukuze akwazi ngakumbi ukuqonda nokucebisa umguli. Abaguli abaninzi babulela nje kwaukufumana ugqirha obaphulaphulayo aze aluthabathe nzulu uludwe lwezinto abakhala ngazo. . . . Inkoliso yabaguli abaneCFS inokuncedwa ichache—kwanangokuqinisekiswa nje ukuba ugqirha ungumncedi wabo—yaye abaninzi basenokuba kwimeko encomeka gqitha.”
Ekubeni kungekho nyango, bambi bayakuthandabuza ukubaluleka kokuya kugqirha. Ingenelo ebalulekileyo yokufuna uncedo olulolo hlobo yeyokuba ukuxilongwa kunokunceda kubekel’ ecaleni ezinye izifo ezisenokuba neempawu ezifanayo, njengomhlaza, imultiple sclerosis, izifo zesikhumba nesifo seLyme. Ukuba ezi zifo zinokwaziwa zisaqala, kunokunikelwa unyango oluluncedo. IEmergency Medicine incomela oku koogqirha: “Wakuba nje uphawule ukuba siso, elona khondo lilungileyo lesenzo kukumthumela umguli lowo kwiziko eliphanda ngesifo sokudinwa ngokungapheliyo.”
Ukuphumla kujongwa njenolona nyango lulunge kakhulu, kodwa ukulungelelana okuhle kuyafuneka, ngoba nokuphumla okugqith’ emgceni kusenokubangela into eyahlukileyo. Ngoko nali icebiso elilungileyo: Zifundise ukuwulawula umzimba wakho. Bazi ubuthathaka bakho umda uze usebenze ngokuvisisana nabo, imihla ngemihla iiveki ngeeveki, iinyanga ngeenyanga. Ukwenza imithambo engaqobiyo, njengokuhambahamba okanye ukuqubha kwichibi elinamanzi afudumeleyo, kusenokuba yingenelo logama nje ingenziwa ngendlela enokubangela ukudinwa komzimba okanye kwengqondo. Uhlobo lokutya okusempilweni okunceda ukomeleza inkqubo yomzimba yokuzikhusela kwizifo kukwabalulekile.
Ukungabi nathemba kusenokufak’ isandla kwesi sifo, njengomzekelo ohlasimlisayo womnye umguli ogama linguTracy owaphelelwa lithemba waza wazibulala. Kodwa ukufa akusosicombululo. Kunjengokuba umhlobo wakhe ogutyungelwe lilifu elimnyama wathi: “Ndiyayazi into eyayifunwa nguTracy, ngokwenene. Wayengafuni kufa. Wayefuna ukuphila—kodwa aphile ekhululekile koko kubandezeleka. Yaye oko kumele kube lusukelo lwethu.” Ewe, lolona sukelo lubalaseleyo. Ngoko tsolisa ithemba lakho, kungekhona ekufeni, kodwa ekuphumeleleni ukufikelela kusukelo, nanini na lufika.
ICFS isesinye sezigulo ezininzi ezingaqhelekanga esongezelelwe kuludwe lwezibetho eziphethel’ imbengwana uluntu lwanamhla. Enoba inzululwazi yezamayeza inokwenza inkqubela engakanani na, ukuphelisa zonke ezo zibetho kuya kufuna okungaphaya kobuchule bezamayeza. UGqirha Omkhulu, uYehova uThixo, ucinga ngokwenza kanye oko—ukunyanga zonke izigulo zwenibanzi—ngolawulo olunothando lorhulumente woBukumkani bakhe. Ngelo xesha “akayi kuthi ummi wakhona, Ndiyafa.” Elo lidinga eliqinisekileyo likaThixo!—Isaya 33:24.
[Ibhokisi ekwiphepha 12, 13]
Indlela Abanokunceda Ngayo Abanye
Oko Ungamele Ukuthethe Uze Ukwenze
◆ “Ubonakala ungumqabaqaba” okanye, “Awubonakali ugula.” Ukuthetha izinto ezinjalo kumenza umguli avakalelwe kukuba awubukholelwa ubuqatha beempawu zokugula anazo.
◆ “Nam ndiziva ndidiniwe.” La mazwi enza kungaqondakali ukubandezeleka. ICFS ibandakanya okungakumbi kunokudinwa nje. Isisifo esibuhlungu nesityhafisayo.
◆ “Ndidiniwe. Inokuba nam ndineCFS.” Oku kusenokuthethwa kuqhulwa, kodwa akukho nto ihlekisayo ngeCFS.
◆ “Ndinqwenela ukukhe ndingasebenzi iintsuku ezimbalwa ndikhe ndiphumle.” Abaguli abaneCFS abakho sekhefini.
◆ “Ubusebenza nzima gqitha. Yiloo nto ugula nje.” Oku kumguli kusenokuthetha ukuba ubekek’ ityala ngoko kwenzekileyo.
◆ “Unjani?” Musa ukukubuza oku ngaphandle kokuba ufuna ukwazi ngenene. Eneneni, umguli usenokukhathazeka kodwa usenokungathandi ukukhala nganto.
◆ “Uzibani-bani ebeneCFS, yaye wagula nje kangangonyaka.” Imeko nganye yeCFS iyahluka ngokwexesha elithabathayo nangobuqatha, yaye ukwalatha ekuchacheni ngokukhawuleza komnye kusenokumdimaza lowo ugula ithuba elide.
◆ Musa ukunikel’ icebiso elingokwezamayeza ngaphandle kokuba uceliwe kwaye ukufanelekele oko.
◆ Musa ukudlulisela kubaguli abaneCFS ingcamango yokuba ukuba baye bagula kwakhona, kungenxa yokuthile abaye bakwenza.
Oko Umele Ukuthethe Uze Ukwenze
◆ Bonisa ukuba uyayikholelwa into yokuba ugula ngokwenene.
◆ Batsalele umnxeba, okanye ubatyelele. Ngokuqhelekileyo ukuqala ngokutsala umnxeba kudla ngokuba yimbono elungileyo.
◆ Yihlonele nayiphi imiqathango engokutyelela okanye yokutsala umnxeba.
◆ Ukuba akamele atyelelwe, mthumelele ikhadi okanye ileta. Abaguli bakulindele ukufumana ileta yonke imihla.
◆ Yiba nemfesane. Maxa wambi oku kuthetha nje ukuvuma oko umguli anako.
◆ Cela ukubahambisela izigidimi, ukubayela evenkileni, ukubasa kwagqirha nezinye izinto.
◆ Usenokuthi nje kuphela: “Ndiyavuyiswa kukukubona. UYehova ukuxabisa ngokwenene ukunyamezela kwakho ngokuthembekileyo.”