Abantu Abaselula Bayabuza . . .

Ndingaphila Njani Ngaphandle Kwabazali Bam?

“Xa ndandineminyaka emithathu ubudala yaye udade wethu enemine, abazali bam baqhawula umtshato. Enkundleni balwela ilungelo lokusigcina, yaye sawela kwicala likamama. Noko ke, xa ndandineminyaka esixhenxe ubudala, mna nodade wethu sagqiba kwelokuba siye kuhlala notata.”—UHoracio.

KWIMINYAKA kamva, utata kaHoracio nesithandwa sakhe esasihlalisana naye bahamba—beshiya uHoracio nodade wabo. UHoracio ukhumbula oku: “Kungeso sizathu endathi ndineminyaka eli-18 ubudala, ndaba yintloko-ntsapho equka udade wethu oneminyaka eli-19 ubudala, udade wethu ngobawo oneminyaka eli-12 ubudala—owagqiba ukuba ahlale nathi—kunye nam.”

Njengokuba inqaku elandulelayo libonisile, izigidi zabantu abaselula ehlabathini lonke zizifumana zingenabazali.a NjengoHoracio, olunye ulutsha luye lwashiywa. Sekunjalo abanye baye baphulukana nabazali babo ngenxa yokufa okanye baye bahlukana nabo ngenxa yeemfazwe okanye iintlekele zokwemvelo. Enoba iyintoni na imeko, ukungabi nabazali kusenokuba nzima yaye kube buhlungu. Yaye kusenokukushiya neembopheleleko ezininzi.

‘Ndiya Kunyanyekelwa Ngubani?’

Indlela oza kuhlangabezana ngayo noku ixhomekeke kwiminyaka nakwiimeko zakho. Kakade ke, imeko iba nzima kakhulu ukuba usengumntwana okanye ukwishumi elivisayo. Nokuba kunjalo, kusenokuba awushiywanga nje wedwa. Mhlawumbi umalume, umakazi, okanye umkhuluwa wakho okanye udadewenu omdala uyafuna ukukunyamekela.

Phakathi kwamaNgqina kaYehova, ukunyamekela iinkedama nabahlolokazi kugqalwa njengenxalenye yonqulo lwawo. (Yakobi 1:27; 2:15-17) Yaye ngokufuthi, abantu abasebandleni baya kunceda. Ngokomzekelo, uHoracio noodade wabo, babefundisise iBhayibhile namaNgqina kaYehova yaye babesiya kwiintlanganiso zawo. Apho badibana nentsapho yamaKristu eyaqalisa ukubanceda. “Hayi indlela endinombulelo ngayo kuYehova nokhokelo lwakhe nothando olunenkathalo imihla ngemihla!” utsho uHoracio. “Sifumene iintsikelelo ngokuncedwa yintsapho yokomoya ebandleni ebinabantwana abalingana nathi. Basithatha njengabantwana babo, yaye okwesihlandlo sokuqala saziva siyinxalenye yentsapho, intsapho esinokuthembela kuyo.”

Noko ke, asilulo lonke ulutsha olunethamsanqa. Ingxelo yeUnited Nations Children’s Fund ithi: “Maxa wambi abantwana abangenabazali basiwa kwiintsapho apho baxhatshazwayo emzimbeni, benyanzelwa ukuba basebenze ngaphandle kokuhlawulwa okanye bafumane ithuba lokuhambela phambili, besenziwa oonongogo okanye benziwe amakhoboka.” Ngoko ukuba unomntu onembopheleleko yokukunyamekela, yiba nombulelo.

Liyinyaniso elokuba, ukungahlali nabazali bakho kuyilahleko enkulu. Yaye ngokuzenzekelayo usenokukucekisa ukungakunyamekeli kwabo. Ukuxelelwa oko umele ukwenze sisalamane okanye ngumnakwenu omdadlana kusenokukucaphukisa. Kodwa musa ukukhuphela umsindo wakho kwabo bazama ukukunyamekela. IBhayibhile ithi: “Ubushushu mabungakuxhokonxeli ekutyhwakrazeni izandla . . . Lumka, ungaguqukeli konobutshinga.” (Yobhi 36:18, 21) Khumbula intombazana eselula eBhayibhileni egama linguEstere. Njengenkedama, wakhuliswa ngumza wakhe omdadlana uMordekayi. Nangona wayengengomzali wakhe wokwenene, uMordekayi ‘wayemmisele’ imithetho, awayithobelayo, kwanaxa sele emdala! (Estere 2:7, 15, 20) Zama ukuthobela nokuba nentsebenziswano. Oko kuya kuphelisa uxinezeleko yaye kwenze izinto zibe lula kuye wonke ubani obandakanyekileyo.

Iimbopheleleko Zentsapho

Ukuba unomnakwenu omdadlana—okanye ukuba nawe umdala ngokwaneleyo—mhlawumbi kusenokwenzeka ukuba wena nabantakwenu ningahlala nodwa. Kusenokwenzeka ukuba kuya kufuneka uthabathe indawo yokuba yintloko ntsapho—imbopheleleko ebonakala isoyisa! Noko ke, kwiimeko ezinjalo uninzi lwabaselula luye lwenza umsebenzi oncomekayo wokukhulisa abantakwabo.

Liyinyaniso elokuba, kusenokufuneka ujamelane neemvakalelo zengqumbo. Ukucinga ngento yokuba uyabathanda yaye ubakhathalele abanakwenu noodade wenu kusenokukunceda uzijonge kakuhle izinto. Kwakhona kusenokunceda ukukujonga ukubanyamekela njengomsebenzi owabelwe nguThixo. Ngapha koko, amaKristu ayalelwa ukuba abanyamekele abangababo. (1 Timoti 5:8) Nokuba ungazama kangakanani na ukuba ngutata okanye umama kubantakwenu, ngokwenene akusoze ube ngumzali wabo.

Akukho ngqiqweni ukulindela ukuba abantakwenu basabele ngendlela efanayo naleyo babesabela ngayo kubazali bakho. Enyanisweni, kusenokuthabatha ithuba ngaphambi kokuba bazinze baze bayamkele imeko. Ngoko okwangoku, zama ukungacaphuki. Buphephe “ubukrakra bolunya nomsindo nengqumbo nokunkqangaza nentetho etshabhisayo.” Ngokuba ngumzekelo, bafundise abantakwenu ukuba babe ‘nobubele omnye komnye, imfesane yofefe, bexolelana ngesisa.’—Efese 4:31, 32.

UHoracio uyavuma ukuba wazenza iimpazamo: “Ngamanye amaxesha ndandingqongqo kakhulu kubantakwethu. Kodwa ngomlinganiselo othile, oko kwakuyinkuselo, yaye sagcina ihambo efanelekileyo phambi kwamehlo kaYehova.”

Ukuzilungiselela

Ukuba akwenzeki ukuba abazali bakho bakunyamekele, alinakukhanyelwa elokuba kuyinkxalabo enzulu ukuzilungiselela ngokwezinto eziphathekayo. Mhlawumbi amalungu amadala ebandleni lamaKristu asenokukunceda wena nabantakwenu, ukuba unabo, ukufunda ukupheka, ukucoca, nokwenza eminye imisebenzi yasekhaya ngoku omele uyinyamekele. Kodwa uza kwenza njani ngemali? Mhlawumbi ayikho enye into onokuyenza ngaphandle kokuba ufumane umsebenzi.

Noko ke, inqabile imisebenzi yabantu abaselula abangenamfundo ingako, amava, okanye ubuchule bomsebenzi. Ngoko ukuba ngandlela ithile kunokwenzeka ukuba ugqibe imfundo esisiseko—okanye kwanokufumana uqeqesho olongezelelekileyo ngomsebenzi—yenjenjalo. UHoracio ukhumbula oku: “Mna nodade wethu omdala sasebenza ukuze sixhase imfundo yam nekadade wethu ngobawo.” Ukuba uhlala kwilizwe elisakhasayo, kusenokufuneka usebenzise ubuchule bakho bokufumana umsebenzi.—Bona inqaku elithi “Ukuyila Imisebenzi Kumazwe Asakhasayo,” kwinkupho kaVukani! kaNovemba 8, 1994.

Kumazwe ahambele phambili kwezoqoqosho, kusenokwenzeka ukuba ufumane uncedo lwemali kurhulumente. Ngokufuthi, kukho imibutho karhulumente okanye ezimeleyo ezinikeleyo ekuncedeni abantwana abangenabazali okanye abalahliweyo. Ngokomzekelo, eminye imibutho isenokukunceda ufumane ukutya okanye ufumane indawo yokuhlala. Kakade ke, imali oyifumanayo ifanele isetyenziswe ngobulumko. IBhayibhile ithi: “Imali ingumthunzi.” (INtshumayeli 7:12) Yaye ngaphandle kokuba uyayilumkela indlela oyiqingqa noyisebenzisa ngayo imali, ngokukhawuleza ‘isenokuzenzela amaphiko, ize iphaphazele.’—IMizekeliso 23:4, 5.

Akunakuba yingxaki kangako ukuzinyamekela ngokwezinto eziphathekayo ukuba kukho umntu omdala okunyamekelayo. Noko ke, kwixesha elizayo kuya kuba yimfuneko ukuba uzinyamekele. Ekubeni ungenabo abazali bokukukhuthaza kwizifundo zakho, kusenokuba ngumgudu ukunikela ingqalelo kwizifundo zakho. Isilumkiso somKristu ongumpostile uPawulos kuTimoti ngokuphathelele uhambelo-phambili lokomoya lisenokusetyenziswa nakwizifundo zesikolo: “Ziphonononge ezi zinto; wendele kuzo, ukuze uhambelo-phambili lwakho lubonakaliswe.” (1 Timoti 4:15) Ngokwenza njalo, uya kumisela umzekelo omhle kwabo bakungqongileyo uze ungenelwe.

Eyona nto ibaluleke ngakumbi yimfuneko yokuba uzinyamekele ngokomoya. Zama ukwenza umzila olungeleleneyo wezinto zokomoya. (Filipi 3:16) Ngokomzekelo, phakathi kwamaNgqina kaYehova kulisiko ngeentsapho ukuxubusha itekisi yeBhayibhile imihla ngemihla. Kutheni oku ungakufaki kucwangciso lwakho? Ucwangciso lokufundisisa iBhayibhile nokuya rhoqo kwiintlanganiso zamaKristu kwakhona kuya kukunceda uhlale womelele ngokomoya.—Hebhere 10:24, 25.

Ukuhlangabezana Nocelomngeni

Akukho nto inzima njengokuphila ngaphandle kwabazali bakabani, kodwa oku akuthethi kuthi iphelil’ intw’ ebithethwa ngawe. Umama kaPaola oneminyaka engama-20 ubudala wafa ngoxa uPaola wayeneminyaka emi-6 kuphela ubudala. Uyise wafa ngoxa wayeneshumi leminyaka ubudala. Ibhinqa elinobuntu labapha ikhusi yena noodade wabo abane. Ngaba wayephila ubomi bentshontsho? Akunjalo. UPaola uthi: “Mhlawumbi asiyiyo intsapho eqhelekileyo, kodwa siphila ubomi nje obuqhelekileyo. Enyanisweni, uthando esinalo phakathi kwethu lomelele ngaphezu kolweentsapho ezininzi.”

Udade boPaola uIrene waleka umsundulu ngelithi: “Nangona singenabazali, siyafana nje nabanye abantu abaselula.” Uthini xa ecebisa abanye abakwimeko efanayo? “Musa ukuvakalelwa kukuba uselishweni.” Ngokufanayo noHoracio uthi: “Le meko indenze ndaqola ngokukhawuleza.”

Ukulahlekelwa ngabazali bakabani sesinye sezona ziganeko ezibuhlungu onokucinga ngazo. Noko ke, qiniseka ukuba, ngoncedo lukaYehova, unokuphumelela uze ufumane intsikelelo yakhe.

[Umbhalo osemazantsi]

[Umfanekiso okwiphepha 14]

Unokufumana inkxaso kubadala abangamaKristu