Amacebiso Kosingamzali

I-BUREAU of the Census yase-U.S. ibikezela ukuthi imikhaya enosingamzali izoba miningi kunemikhaya enakho kokubili ubaba no-mama abangokwemvelo ngo-1995. Ngalesosikhathi, izingane ezingu-59 kulelo nalelokhulu ziyohlala “emikhayeni exutshiwe” (imikhaya enosingamzali) ngaphambi kokuba zifinyelele eminyakeni engu-18. Okulandelayo ukusikisela okumbalwa nje kokusiza lelinani elandayo losingamzali.

Bunikeze Isikhathi: Osingamzali kumelwe bakhumbule ukuthi kudinga isikhathi ngezingane ukuba zamukele umzali omusha. Uchwepheshe wempilo engokwengqondo uMavis Hetherington uchaza ukuthi kungani izinyanga zokuqala ezimbalwa—noma iminyaka—ingaba nzima kangaka: “Lapho usanda kushada kabusha, kokubili amadodana namadodakazi anenzondo, anomoya ophansi, anombono ophambene futhi awathukuthelele nje kuphela usingayise kodwa futhi nonina. Athukuthelele . . . unina ngokuphinde ashade.” Osingamzali kumelwe bazame ukuqonda imizwa yezingane, nakuba lokho kungase kube inselele.—Bheka IzAga 19:11.

Qala Ngokwakha Ubuhlobo Obuhle: UJoy Conolly, encwadini yakhe ethi Stepfamilies, ngokuhlakanipha uxwayisa ngokuthi osingamzali bayoba sesimweni esingcono sokuqondisa ukuziphatha kwalezingane ngemva kokuba sebeye bakha ubuhlobo obuhle nazo. Okwamanje, kungase kube ngcono ngomzali ongokwemvelo ukunikeza ukuyala okudingekile. (Qhathanisa nezAga 27:6.) Ngakolunye uhlangothi, osingamzali banganikeza izingane umuzwa wokuthi akukho lutho olushintshile ekuphileni kwabo ngokusekela izinqubo abebelokhu bezijabulela—njengokuthatha uhambo olude ngezinyawo noma ukudlala ndawonye. Nokho, osingayise akufanele basebenzise izikhathi zokudla njengamathuba okuthethisa umkhaya.

Gwema Ukukhetha: Uma kungenzeka, usingayise noma usinganina kumelwe agweme noma yibuphi ubufakazi bokubonisa ukuthi ukhetha izingane zakhe, kungakhathaliseki ukuthi lokhu kungaba nzima kangakanani ngezinye izikhathi.—Qhathanisa namaRoma 2:11.

Sondelana Nabo Ngokuqapha: Ukuhlolwa kwamuva kwemikhaya enosingamzali kuye kwathola ukuthi ngokuvamile kunzima kakhulu ukuzwana kosingayise namadodakazi. Omunye umlobi ukubeka ngalendlela: “Osingayise bayazama ukugcina umzila wokukhulumisana uvulekile, futhi lamantombazane awazimisele ukwenza kanjalo. Osingayise bayazama ukunikeza ukuyala, futhi lamantombazane ayakwenqaba.” Lomlobi ukubeka ngamafuphi: “Kubonakala sengathi akukho okuphumelelayo usingayise angakwenza ekuqaleni ngalamantombazane.” Ngakho kudingeka isineke esi-khulu nozwela. Nakuba ama-ntombazane ekwazisa ukutuswa ngomlomo kukasingayise, ngokuvamile azizwa engakhululekile ngokuthintwa ngezandla njengokwanga. Usingayise kufanele aqaphele ukuthi intombazane ingase izizwe ngalendlela. Uma izizwa ngaleyondlela, kufanele agcizelele kakhulu ukutusa ngomlomo nengxoxo kunokubonakalisa uthando ngokumthinta.—Qhathanisa nezAga 25:11.

Qaphela Umona: Okuhlangenwe nakho kubonisa ukuthi amadodakazi amaningi avame ukubheka usinganina njengomncintisani. Usinganina okulindele futhi ozwelana nemizwa yentombazane angase akuvimbele ngokuhlakanipha ukuqhudelana. Ubaba angasiza ekudambiseni isimo esishubile ngokuqinisekisa indodakazi yakhe ngothando lwakhe oluqhubekayo nokuyazisa. (IzAga 15:1) Abacwaningi baxwayisa ngokuthi ngokuvamile osingamama bazama ngawo wonke amandla futhi ngokushesha kakhulu ukuba bamukeleke njengomama emadodakazini abo amasha. Nalapha futhi, isihluthulelo siyisineke.

Ukuba usingamzali akulula. Kodwa kungafezwa, njengoba izinkulungwane zezibonelo eziphumelelayo zibonisa. Futhi khumbula, iBhayibheli linikeza iseluleko esingcono kunazo zonke sempumelelo kunoma yisiphi isimo somkhaya lapho lithi: “Yembathani uthando oluyisibopho sokuphelela.”—Kolose 3:14.