Ukubhekana Nezinselele Zokuba Umama Usemncane

UKUKHULELWA kwentsha kuhambisana nomthwalo wokwenza izinqumo zabantu abadala. “Ngizizwa sengathi ngineminyaka engu-40,” kusho omunye umama osemncane. “Ngiziphuthisele bonke ubusha bami.” Ngempela, lapho nje izwa ukuthi isikhulelwe, intombazane ingase igajwe ngokuphelele ukwesaba nokukhathazeka.

Uma uyintombazane ekhulelwe, nawe ungase uzizwe ngaleyo ndlela. Nokho, awufezi lutho ngokuzivumela ukuba ukhwantabaliswe imizwelo engemihle. IBhayibheli lithi: “Obheka umoya ngeke ahlwanyele mbewu; nalowo obheka amafu ngeke avune.” (UmShumayeli 7:8; 11:4) Umlimi okhwantabaliswa ukukhathazeka ngesimo sezulu ngeke asithathe isinyathelo esidingekile. Gwema ukukhwantabaliswa yisimo sakho. Kakade kumelwe uqhubekele phambili futhi utshathe umthwalo wakho wemfanelo.—Galathiya 6:5.

Yikuphi ukukhetha obhekene nakho? Abanye bangase bakutshele ukuthi ucabangele ukukhipha isisu. Kodwa abantu abafuna ukujabulisa uNkulunkulu abanakukukhetha lokhu, ngoba iBhayibheli likwenza kucace ukuthi ukukhipha isisu kuphambene nomthetho kaNkulunkulu. (Eksodusi 20:13; 21:22, 23; IHubo 139:14-16) Ukuphila kwanoma imuphi umbungu—kuhlanganise nokwalowo ovele ngaphandle kwefindo lomshado—kuyigugu kuNkulunkulu.

Kuthiwani ngokushada noyise wengane futhi niyikhulise nobabili ingane yenu? Mhlawumbe umshado ungalinciphisa ihlazo okulo. Kodwa ngisho noma umfana onguyise wengane enomuzwa wokuthi unomthwalo wemfanelo wokulekelela ekukhulisweni kwengane yakhe, umshado awusona isinqumo esiwukuhlakanipha ngaso sonke isikhathi.a Iqiniso lokuthi umfana useyakwazi ukukhulelisa alisho neze ukuthi usenamakhono angokomzwelo nangokwengqondo adingekayo ukuze abe umyeni nobaba omuhle. Futhi alisho ukuthi angakwazi ukondla inkosikazi nengane. Ngaphezu kwalokho, uma umfana ekwenye inkolo, ukushada naye kungaphula umyalo weBhayibheli wokushada “kuphela eNkosini.” (1 Korinte 7:39) Okuhlangenwe nakho kubonisa ukuthi ukugijimela umshado nisebancane—futhi okungenzeka ube owesikhashana—kungase kuphumele ebuhlungwini nasekuhluphekeni okwengeziwe.

Kuthiwani ngokunikela ngomntwana ukuba athathwe abanye? Yize lokhu kungcono impela kunokukhipha isisu, kufanele ucabangele iqiniso lokuthi naphezu kwezimo ezingakuvuni, unalo ithuba lokunakekela nokukhulisa ingane yakho.

Ukubhekana Nezinselele

Kuyavunywa, akulula ukukhulisa ingane ungenamyeni. Nokho, ngokulandela izimiso zeBhayibheli ngangokusemandleni akho nangokuthembela kuNkulunkulu ukuba akunike amandla nesiqondiso, ungaphumelela ekubhekaneni nezinselele eziningi. Nazi izinyathelo ezimbalwa ongazithatha ezizokusiza ukuba uphumelele.

● Vuselela ubuhlobo bakho noNkulunkulu. Qaphela ukuthi ubulili ngaphambi komshado buyisono kuNkulunkulu—ukwephula izindinganiso zakhe eziphakeme zokuziphatha. (Galathiya 5:19-21; 1 Thesalonika 4:3, 4) Ngakho isinyathelo sokuqala esibalulekile ukuphenduka ucele intethelelo kuNkulunkulu. (IHubo 32:5; 1 Johane 2:1, 2) Yiqiniso, ungase uzizwe ungalufanelekele usizo lwakhe. Nokho, uJehova uthembisa ukuthethelela, futhi uyabasiza labo abaphendukayo ebubini babo. (Isaya 55:6, 7) Ku-Isaya 1:18, uJehova uthi: “Nakuba izono zenu kungenzeka ukuthi zibomvu klebhu [zisinda, zizinkulu], zizokwenziwa zibe mhlophe njengeqhwa [zihlanzwe ngokuphelele].” IBhayibheli futhi likhuthaza abenzi bobubi ukuba basebenzise usizo olungokomoya olunikezwa abadala abamisiwe ebandleni.—Jakobe 5:14, 15.

● Yeka ukuhlanganyela ubulili ngaphambi komshado. Cishe lokho kuyosho ukunqamula ubuhlobo noyise wengane yakho. Ukuqhubeka nalobo buhlobo ngaphandle komshado kuyomane kukuchaye engcindezini yokuqhubeka uhileleka ekuziphatheni okungamjabulisi uNkulunkulu. Ungakhohlwa nanini ukuthi imithetho kaNkulunkulu, yize iqinile, yenzelwe ukuba isivikele. UNicole, ocashunwe ekuqaleni kwalolu chungechunge, uyakhumbula: “Ngaqaphela ukuthi uNkulunkulu uqinisile. Ufuna ukuzuzisa thina.”—Isaya 48:17, 18.

● Tshela abazali bakho. Kulindelekile ukuba wesabe ukuthi abazali bakho bazokuthukuthelela. Yiqiniso, kuzobacasula futhi kubakhathaze ukuzwa ukuthi ukhulelwe. Bangase babe nomuzwa wokuthi bahlulekile njengabazali baze bazibeke icala ngokuziphatha kwakho okubi. Nokho, uma abazali bakho bemesaba ngempela uNkulunkulu, cishe lesi siqubu sobuhlungu nosizi siyodlula ngokuhamba kwesikhathi. Bangabazali bakho, futhi bayakuthanda naphezu kwamaphutha akho. Lapho bebona ukuphenduka kwakho, akungabazeki ukuthi bayoshukumiseleka ukuba balingise uyise wendodana esaphazayo bese bekuthethelela ngothando.—Luka 15:11-32.

● Bonisa ukubonga. Abazali, izihlobo, nabangane ngokuvamile baba umthombo omkhulu wosizo nokusekela. Ngokwesibonelo, abazali bakho bangase bahlele ukuba uthole ukunakekela kwezokwelapha. Ngemva kokuba ingane isizelwe, bangase bakusize ukuba ufunde izinto eziyisisekelo ekunakekelweni kosana; bangase bakusize nangokukubhekela ingane. UNicole uthi ngonina, “Yimi engazala ingane, kodwa yena wenza okuningi kakhulu ukuze angisize.” Abangane nabo bangase bakusize, mhlawumbe ngobuhlakani bakunike izingubo zomntwana nezinye izinto ezingaba usizo. (IzAga 17:17) Lapho uboniswa umusa, landela iseluleko seBhayibheli ‘uzibonise ungobongayo.’ (Kolose 3:15) Amazwi okwazisa angenza abakusizayo bangabi nomuzwa wokuthi uzithatha kalula izenzo zabo zothando.

● Funda amakhono okuba umzali. Yiqiniso, awufuni ukuba umthwalo ohlala njalo emkhayeni wakini nakubangane. Ngakho qala ukufunda amakhono azokusiza ukuba ukwazi ngesilinganiso esithile ukunakekela ingane yakho nokuphatha ikhaya. Ukufunda ukunakekela ingane ewumbunyalala kuyinselele. Kuningi okumelwe ukufunde ngokudla, impilo nezinye izinto ezihilelekile ekunakekeleni ingane. Ngokuthakazelisayo, iBhayibheli likhuthaza abesifazane asebekhulile abangamaKristu ukuba bakhuthaze abesifazane abasebasha ukuba babe “abasebenzayo ekhaya.” (Thithu 2:5) Akungabazeki ukuthi unyoko—mhlawumbe namanye amalungu asemadala ebandla lobuKristu—angakuqeqesha ngendlela ewusizo kule ndaba.

● Yiphathe ngokuhlakanipha imali. IBhayibheli lithi ‘imali iyisivikelo.’ (UmShumayeli 7:12) Ukufika kosana kuyodala izindleko ezinkulu.

Ungase uqale ngokuthola usizo lukahulumeni olufanelekelayo. Nokho, ngokuvamile intombazane kusamelwe incike kubazali ngokwezimali. Uma kunjalo ngawe, kungaba ukuhlakanipha nokubonelela uma ungase unciphise izindleko kakhulu kangangokunokwenzeka. Yize ngokungangabazeki ungathanda ukuthola izinto ezintsha zengane, kodwa ungase wonge imali ngokuthenga ezitolo zamasekeni noma lapho kunendali khona.

● Zama ukuthola imfundo. IzAga 10:14 zithi: “Abahlakaniphile yilabo ababekelela ulwazi.” Nakuba lokhu kuyiqiniso ikakhulukazi ngokuphathelene nolwazi lweBhayibheli, kuyasebenza nasemfundweni yezwe. Kudingeka ube namakhono adingekayo ukuze uziphilise.

Kuyavunywa ukuthi akulula ukuya esikoleni ube unakekela usana. Nokho, ukuntula imfundo eyisisekelo kunganenza wena nengane yakho niphile ngobuphofu ukuphila kwenu konke, nithembele kuhulumeni, usebenze umsebenzi oholela kancane, nihlale endlini ephansi, noma ningondleki kahle. Ngakho uma kungenzeka, qhubeka uya esikoleni. Unina kaNicole waphikelela ukuba uNicole aqede esikoleni, futhi ngenxa yalokho kamuva wakwazi ukuqeqeshelwa ukuba umsizi wommeli ukuze azondle.

Kungani ungahloli ukuthi yimaphi amathuba emfundo akuvulekele? Uma ukuya esikoleni kuyinkinga, ungase ubheke ukuthi ungekwazi yini ukufunda usekhaya. Ngokwesibonelo, ukufunda ngeposi kungase kukusebenzele.

Ungaphumelela

Ukukhulisa ingane ngaphandle komshado kuyinselele entombazaneni esencane. Kodwa ungaphumelela! Ngesineke, ukuzimisela, nangosizo lukaJehova uNkulunkulu, ungaba umzali onothando nonekhono. Futhi izingane zomama abangashadile zingakhula zibe abantu abadala abazinzile. Ingani, ungase ujabulele ukubona ingane yakho isabela kahle ekuyilolongeni nasekuyiqeqesheni kwakho futhi iba umthandi kaNkulunkulu.—Efesu 6:4.

UNicole ukubeka ngale ndlela: “Ngosizo lukaNkulunkulu—naphezu kokuthi kwakusinda kwehlela—ngaba nenjabulo yokusiza intombazanyana yami ukuba ibe intokazi enomusa, ehloniphayo nenengqondo. Uma ngiyibheka ngikhumbula zonke izikhathi zokuqwasha ebusuku kodwa futhi ngifikelwa injabulo enkulu.”

Kodwa-ke, abantu abadala kufanele bayiphathe kanjani intsha engomama nezinsana zayo? Ikhona yini indlela yokusiza intsha ukuba igweme kwabona ubuhlungu bokukhulelwa isencane?

[Umbhalo waphansi]

[Izithombe ekhasini 9]

Intsha engomama ibhekana nezinselele eziningi ekukhuliseni izingane zayo

[Isithombe ekhasini 10]

Ukugijimela ukushada nisebancane akulona ikhambi

[Isithombe ekhasini 10]

Abadala abangamaKristu bangasiza intsha ephambukayo ukuba ilungise ubuhlobo bayo noNkulunkulu

[Isithombe ekhasini 11]

Kuwukuhlakanipha ukuba omama abangashadile baqedele imfundo yabo eyisisekelo